Cayton's Weekly

Cayton's Weekly SEATTLE, WASHINGTON, SATURDAY, MARCH 29, 1919 --- PRICE FIVE CENTS CAYTON'S WEEKLY In the interest of equal rights and equal justice to all men and for "all men up." A publication of general information, but in the main voicing the sentiments of the Colored Citizens. Subscription $2 per year in advance. Special rates made to clubs and societies. HORACE ROSCOE CAYTON..Editor and Publisher Entred as second class matter, August 18, 1916, at the post office at Seattle, Wash., under the Act of March 3rd, 1916. TELEPHONE: BEACON 1910 Office 303 22nd Ave. South GO TO THE FRONT Who would be free must himself strike the first blow and self preservation is the first law of nature. The above thoughts have been inspired from reading an article written by Roscoe Simmons and a paragraphs therein reads as follows: "Say, I complained, to the most famous American correspondent in France, why was it that you suppressed all the heroics of the American Negro during the war? I then explained that nothing came over to the states in report of unusual conduct of the Negro, although the French had poured into my ears the finest stories of the American Negro, of his bravery, his dash, his unmatched courage, of the eagle eye that is his when the firing is the hottest and fastest, and that even American officers, without exception thus far noted, named the Negro only to praise." "Well, then," he wanted to know of me, "why did the colored people of America let a war like this go through wouthout having competent correspondents, white or colored, at the front, to write a story that would have been an important chapter in the story of the Race—write while great deads were being done, and while the world was reading, day for day, week for week, of the conflict?" I fell back immediately on the old and faithful argument employed by the Race—poverty. But this man, who, knowing war and peace, knows men, would have none of it. "I am just from the states," he replied, "and noticed no great poverty among colored people—they seem to have money for anything they want, and usually get whatever they desire." A lesson from the above may be drawn for the colored man at home. Instead of combining their moneys and making jobs for themselves and their friends they wait for the white man to make jobs for them their friends and then they complain because they are not given some of the jobs. If the spirit of unity prevailed among the colored citizens of Seattle instead of three small stores operated by colored persons there would be not less than one hundred. Socially the white man is against the black man, but when it comes to doing business the white man will trade with any one that will give him a bargain. If the Japanese can fatten on the white man's trade the colored man can do so and will do so when he cuts out so much of his clanishness. You yourself get on the firing line if you want to send back favorable reports. An old lady, exceedingly hard of hearing, lived near the river. One afternoon a warship fired a salute of ten guns. The woman, alone in her little house, waited until the booming ceased. Then she smoothed her dress, brushed her hair back in a quaint manner, and said sweetly, "Come in." EDITORIALS PARAGRAPHS There is a scarcity of shipyard workers in Seattle just now. The men on the outside are waiting to see if there will be another strike. If more persons would extend an invitation to the editor hereof to take dinner with them the high cost of living would no longer give us uneasiness of mind. It seems to us that the peace conference is simply parceling out the world to the powers thereof and that too without regard to justice and fair play. Jack Johnson wants to fight the four best pugilists in the world one after the other. Jack must think it will take a whole lot of licking to make him good. Fourteen white lynchers have been sent to prison in Winston-Salem, North Carolina. Right you are, Uncle Jasper, "the world do move." Were there a league of nations in existence at present Uncle Sam would have to send forces to Europe to quell the present local disturbances going on now. If you can not say something good about the other fellow then do not say anything at all. Make this a rule of your life and you will live long, be happy and go to Heaven when you die. Base ball fans are anxiously awaiting the coming of Rube Foster and his wonders of the diamond because they seem to be the greatest base ball aggregation that hath as yet ever appeared. The beast of Berlin appears to be just as mad now as it was before the armistice was signed. So mad is it that we are of the opinion that it will have to be roped before it can be shod. We notice that George Listman, the late Seattle civil service commissioners, is now a banker. While the office paid no salary it must have had a hell of a lot of perquisites. Multiplied millions of dollars are to be raised in this country for church extension work and we suggest a great deal of it be used among the white barbarians of our own sunny south. Butterworth must think his case desperate or he would not have surrounded himself with such an array of alleged legal talent. It is old adage that says: "desperate cases require desperate remedies." Every time you or the other fellow sends a subscription to Cayton's Weekly, you double the determination of the editor to publish a periodical that you will be glad to get and likewise be proud of. Lynching goes bravely on in the South, and the war having been finished in Uncle Sam's favor, we are thoroughly convinced that our efforts in Europe has made the world quite safe for democracy. Judge King Dykeman is to be congratulated for cutting out the candy, flower and sickly sentiment sent to Ruth Garrison, the red handed murderess, now in the custody of the juvenile court. Japan is threatening to withdraw from the peace conference unless she gets her demands, which of course means she will form an alliance with Germany, Austria and Russia, which very thing she has wanted to do from the very outset. VOL. III. NO. 43 Since the very day of the Johnson-Willard fight we have been of the opinion that it was a fake and Johnson got knocked out for a prearranged price, but at that we have no respect for Johnson, who, four years thereafter peaches to get even. If there be a more degenerate wretch in all this world than Ruth Garrison, then, in our opinion, she has not as yet been discovered. There is not a hag in the county jail that she would not demoralize, if permitted to associate with. If another Seattle shipyard strike is voted by organized labor, though coastwise in its nature, Seattle would do well to give up the shipbuilding idea and seek other avenues of commercial and industrial activities. From a colored man's journalistic standpoint there must be poor picking about the peace conference as Roscoe Simmons is on his way home and while there he not only did not set the world on fire, but did not even start a blaze. It has been charged by Delegate Wickersham that the funds for the Alaska railroad have been wasted by Secretary Lane. By another, it is claimed that, wasted, as used by Wickersham, is a soft term for stolen. After sending out a number of bills last week we sat ourselves down and waited patiently for favorable replies that we might get a steak or a ham hock for Sunday, but we got no reply and so we had neither. However, we still live in hope though we may die in despair. A California judge has ruled that Hindus are white. If that ruling is not reversed the bars have been let down for the major portion of the colored people of this country to become white, as half of the colored folk are whiter than the Hindus and the other half of a like complexion. Again Dr. Bundy, the East St. Louis dentist, charged with murder in connection with the riots there, is facing a jury. He is no longer backed by the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People, owing to misunderstandings having arisen between them. "Stop my paper! I did not like an editorial in the last issue and I do not want it any longer", came to us by mail not long since. We do not exactly pronounce the sender of the message a damphool, but he was in the first stages of the disease. We edit this paper from our own mind, and not from the minds of subscribers. Many of the colored persons living in the cities are crying for a few acres in the country on which to move and reside and yet many of the colored persons having acreage in the country want to sell and move to the city. What you have you do not want, but what you have not you want damn bad. It wuold be no more inconsistent for President Wilson to unconditionally pardon Debs than to advocate the liberation of Mooney. Debs is guilty of only shooting off his mouth while Mooney is guilty of shooting off bombs in the midst of thousands of innocent persons, but our president passeth all understanding. --- --- The Lane in Seattle has no turn claims Mayor Hanson. It at least has no turn in Hanson's direction. The daily papers did not quite make a heroine of Ruth Garrison, but they did their "damdest." March may not be going out like a lion, but she has much the appearance of a polar bear. Germany says she will fight again before she will cede a foot of territory to France. Germany has shot off her mouth before. All Europe is shot to pieces just now and it occurs to us that the fighting has just begun. Another thought also occurs to us in this connection and it is Uncle Sam is bringing the boys home entirely too soon. If Tom Murphine does not build for himself a political machine in Seattle that will make the shades of the lamented Leigh Hunt set up and take notice then we miss our guess. Down South the Democrats pull off some raw political stunts to get their men in, but none quite so raw as the one pulled off by the Standard Oil bunch at Butte one day this week. Either W. E. Mitchell of Seattle has been handed a bunch or Seattle was not inclined to pay patriotic homage to the Colored Soldiers returning from "over there," as the most of the boys are now at Camp Lewis. With the Standard Oil Bolsheviks operating in the North and the Democratic Bolsheviks operating in the South, Gen. Anarchy should not be long in taking possession of this land of the free and home of the brave. That specie of the genus homo known as "colored miners" are rapidly disappearing from the Northwest. The migration has been made without fuss or feathers and so the tribe was about extinct before it became generally known. "Government officials considering coal prices," comes the report and we suspect they are devising ways and means to protect the coal barons from loss during the summer, when not very much coal is consumed. LINCOLN WALKS AT NIGHT LINCOLN WALKS AT NIGHT It is portentous, and a thing of state, That here, at midnight, in our little town A mourning figure walks, and will not rest, Near the old court house pacing up and down. Or by his homestead, or in shadowed yards He lingers where his children used to play, Or through the market, on the well-worn stones He stalks until the dawn-stars burn away. A bronzed, lank man! His suit of ancient black, A famous high top-hat and plain worn shawl Make his the quaint great figure that men love, The prairie lawyer, master of us all. His head is bowed. He thinks of men and kings, Yea, when the sick world cries, how can he sleep? Too many peasants fight, they know not why, Too many homesteads in black terror weep. He cannot rest until a spirit-dawn Shall come—the shining hope of Europe free; The league of sober folks, the Workers' Earth Bringing long peace to Cornland, Alp and Sea. It breaks his heart that kings must murder still, That all his hours of travail here for men Seem yet in vain. And who will bring white peace That he may sleep upon his hill again? —Vachel Lindsay. Two furnished rooms with priviledge of kitchen and other home accommodations. Rates reasonable. 1914 East Fir Street. THE PASSING THRONG It has been said, "one half of the world does not know what the other half is doing," which is more or less true, but if each side would but stir about and meet each other at home and on the highways both would know more about the other, than to remain at home and wonder about it. Having convinced myself that theory as advanced above is absolutely correct, I set out last Sunday morning to meet a few persons and hear from them how things with them were. The sun shone bright and the "idle rich" were out by the thousands in their expensive limousines and I really enjoyed to see them fly by. At Rainier Beach I called at the home of Mrs. Hyram Moore. I was a bit in doubt of being at the right place, but the number on the door answered to the number on my book and I was on the right street so I ventured in. Mrs. Moore owns an inviting home in a more or less select community and its surroundings show much care and cultivation. Despite the fact she has been a resident of Seattle some eight years or more I had never before met her and was agreeably surprised to find in her one of the most cultured ladies in the Northwest. Mrs. Moore has spent much time with the brush and easel and she has paintings that would make an expert connoiseur set up and take notice. After viewing her numerous productions, I wondered why she did not have them all on exhibition somewhere as an advertisement of what she could do and in connection therewith a school of art, at which she would be at the head. I was glad that a small matter of business called me to her home as I saw things I had not the remotest idea were to be found in the home of a colored family and that too the production of the lady of the house. Once upon a time a man owned a farm and he had worked very hard to fashion it to his liking, but somehow or another he never quite succeeded, and so he decided to sell it and buy one somewhere else in the wide world more to his liking, and to that end he called on a real estate agent and placed it in his hands for sale. He described the place to the agent, who jotted down what he had to say about the farm. The next day the advertisement appeared in the paper and after the farmer had read and reread the advertisement he called on the agent and said, "Is that my place you have advertised," and having received an affirmative answer the farmer replied, "well that farm is not for sale as it's the very kind of a farm I was about to set out to find," and so the deal was off. Last Sunday I visited a farm of a colored man near Kennydale and I had been in his presence but a short time before he said, "I want to sell my place and get one that suits me better." His place was on a public highway on which hundreds of automobiles passed every day. The place has a comfortable home on it and a vast variety of fruit trees and berry bushes and a fine spring of water. The land is in a high state of cultivation and, to a city chap, it appeared to be an ideal country home, and near enough to Seattle to go to and from the city in a couple of hours. The owner had money in his pocket and knew nothing of the want for the necessities of life and in spite of all these he wanted to sell because he believed there was something better somewhere. When his place is advertised he may conclude that that place, after all, is his ideal. I often meet H. Harding in Seattle, who works at the steel plant, on his way to and from work, and of course I always supposed he depended upon his job for the support of himself and family. Yes I knew he lived at Kennydale, but I thought he did that to dodge the expenses of the city. I was in Kennydale last Sunday and called at Mr. Harding's home, which is on a two-acre plot of ground, which is in a high state of cultivation. In addition to the fruit and vegetables he raises on the ground he has a bunch of hogs and a covey of chickens which between himself and wife he cares for at night after returning from work in the city. How much he will make on the chickens is more or less problematical, but I feel absolutely certain he will lose nothing on them. On his hogs, unless they get the cholera, he will realize as much as he will from his daily labors, as hogs are hogs just now. He can sell a six weeks' old pig for $10 and a six months' old hog for nearly $40. He has more than twenty pigs and so you can see what he practically has in his hands. When you see a person you cannot always tell what's under the hat. There is a small church just beyond Kennydale and services were being held therein last Sunday and being acquainted with the most of those who worship therein, I hung about in the warm sun shine until after the services and the first person I met was Johnny Mathews, whom I had known for many years. In Seattle Johnny is a jack of all trades and I was rather surprised to learn that he was the pastor of this church. The old adage "you may be entertaining an angel unawares" was quite applicable in this case as I had from time to time done business with Mathews and little suspected that he was a preacher and held a regular pastorate—another case of one half of the world not knowing what the other half is doing. Get out and stir around and the wisest ones will learn something new. A stranger in a country community inquired of an Irishman the direction to a certain home. "Take that road and go down through the timber a half a mile, then the road will fork and you take the left hand fork; go another half mile, when that road will fork and you take the center fork; then go one mile until you reach a heavy undergrowth where the road stops." The Irishman had no further description for the man and in despair he exclaimed, "and then which way do you go?" "In faith and be jasus if you are not lost you are dam close to it." I inquired the way to reach the home of S. S. Mounday and after receiving the desired information I set out to find it from the description I had recived, and after getting lost a half dozen or more times, finally reached my destination, and was immediately convinced that I was fully repaid for all my worries. In the deep recesses of a valley the Mounday home is located and its a true case of living at home and boarding at the same place. A comfortable home sits on an acre tract of land that's so rich that potatoes, turnips and beets grow so large that you have to split them open to get them into the bin. In other words, the Mounday family raises more fruit and vegetables on that plot of ground than the family can consume and though in Seattle they know nothing of want. But few colored families would have gotten a home so far from the thoroughfare as did the Moundays, and, believe me, but few colored families in Seattle live as independent as do the Moundays. Its worth a whole lot to get acquainted. Last Monday evening John F. Cragwell, who has seen Seattle grow from thirty thousand to four hundred thousand, invited a few of his friends, who like himself, had watched her grow, to a stag dinner at which the delicacies of the season were served. In the midst of the festivities it was announced that the occasion was the celebration of Mr. Gragwell's fifty-eighth birthday, which made it doubly enjoyable. When the birthday cake was brought in as a surprise to Mr. Cragwell his little grandson rose and delivered the following brief eulogy: It is great to live in times like these when thought and action are moulding the destinies of men; when from the hilltops of time one is permitted to look backward, and take note of events that have taken place within the remembrance of fifty years. During this period, electricity has largely supplanted steam, the automobile has taken eee Bet the place of the horse, and the aviator is contesting with the birds of the air the right of way. To the man whom we have gathered to honor tonight, I am permitted to present, as a small evidence of my love and rever- ence, this beautiful cake, on the celebration of his birthday—1861-1919. For nearly thirty years John Franklin Cragwell has lived in Seattle—more than half of his life—and during all that time he has been always more or less in the public eye. He was the first colored man to go from Seattle as a regular delegate to a Republican state convention. He has plunged in real estate and in business and at times had money to burn, and, perhaps, did it. He is still active and wields more or less influence in the community. If he keeps up his present pace much of his use- fulness is ahead instead of behind him. Here’s hoping that he will see another fifty eight summers. Twenty-five years ago at Roslyn I met James E. Shepperson, who was a visitor in Seattle one day last week. At the time he was the political factotum of the colored population of Kittitas county, in which the Roslyn coal mines are located. He was so, largely because he, Jim Shepperson, or better known as ‘‘Shep,’’ had been instru- mental in bringing some 800 colored miners to Roslyn, the most of whom had implicit confidence in him. Those colored miners broke the strike at Roslyn of months dura- tion which gave Shep a high standing among the white citizens, so for many years Shep was a high mogul in the councils of the Republican party in both Kittitas coun- ty and the state of Washington. ‘‘The good old days of Roslyn have long since gone and never to return. There are but few colored miners at Roslyn now and the num- ber grows smaller every year, but it is still dear old Roslyn to me,’’ said Shep as he and I sat takling over old days while he was in the city. : Emmett H. Holmes is serving his second term as grand master of Washington and jurisdiction and I would not be surprised if he is not re-elected this year and next year and so on ad infinitum. In the early history of Masonry in Washington and jurisdiction the position of grand master rotated and did so until Emmett was first elected and then the rotation jumped a cog and since then the wheel has refused to revolve. It is not recorded that Holmes threw a monkey wrench into the machinery, but I, having worked in polities with him for the past twenty-five years, have my suspicions that either Holmes or some close personal friend of Holmes did throw the monkey wrench into the machinery which has completely disabled the rotary valves, and as long as Holmes wills it, ‘‘there is not gwine to be any core.’’ There was an important Masonic trial in Seattle one day this week. It was of suf- ficient importance to warrant Emmett H. Holmes, grand master of the state, being present. As to the fellow on trial, the facts of the case and the final outcome of the trial I know nothing, but I felt that it was of a serious nature as I overheard a physi- sian say to one of the men who was to sit in judgment, ‘‘If you need a doctor I will be at home and will be there immediately if not sooner.’’ Evidently he was not called as I have heard nothing further of the trial. The above alleged case reminds us of a case that was being tried in Seattle EDUCATION A statement made by the Public Educa- tion Association declares that there are 30,- 009 to 50,000 children in New York City who are receiving no instruction whatever because of the shortage of 1,000 teachers. “Unless the salaries of teachers as well as the conditions under which they work are made just and attractive we camuot retain the rYorce we now have, let alone obtain new ones.’’ New appropriations, aggregating $1,108,- 525, to schools and colleges have been made by the General Education Board founded by John D. Rockefeller as follows: For medical education— to Johns Hopkins Medi- eal School, Baltimore, for the endowment of a department of obstetrics, $400,000. To colleges—The College of St. Catherine, St. Paul, Minn., $100,000; Emory and Henry College, Emory, Va., $75,000; Reed College, Portland, Ore., $150,000; West Virginia Wesleyan College, Buckhannon, W. Va., $125,000; total, $450,000. For Negro edu- cation—Meharry Medical College, Nashville, Tenn., $150,000; Fisk University, Nashville, Tenn., $12,500; Lane College, Jackson, Tenn., $7,000; Manassas Industrial School, Mana-s sas, Virvinia, $2,000; Penn Normal and In- dustrial School, Frogmore,, St. Helena Is- land, S. C., $6,000; Spelman Seminary, At- lanta, Ga., $5,000; St. Augustine School, Raleigh, N. C., $2,000; Virginia Normal and Industrial Institute, Petersburg, Va., $500; Home-Makers’ Club Work in the South, $43,575; Summer Schools for Negro Teach- ers, $29,950; total, $258,525. The latest reports from all parts of the nation indicate that the colored students of the United States have subscribed to the united war work fund nearly $50,000. Out of approximately 130 secondary and col- legiate schools only about 100 have reported. The quota for colored schools was $30,000. C. H. Tobias, secretary of the international committee of the Y. M. C. A., was national director. Miss Catherine LeAlted represent- ed the woman students. THE KINGS ““We kings must stick together,’’ said Bill, upon a time, ‘‘through every kind of weather, through every brand of crime. By heaven ’tis appointed that all the crowned galoots, wtih rancid oil anointed, should travel in cahoots. To all kings I am broth- er; we'll soon be going lame, if we don’t back each other, and play each other’s game.’’ Then many kings were reigning some fourteen hours a day, and all of them were straining to make the business pay. I saw them blithely kinging, some five brief years ago; and they were dancing, singing, and romppinpg to and fro. Each had his robe of ermine, each was a gaudy cuss, the Austrian, the German, the Bulgar and the Russ. I have no space to mention all kings who frolicked then, each with a high inten- tion to boss his fellow men. And now the kings are scattered, and some of them are dead, the snaps they had are shattered, their swords with rust are red. They did not stick together, they made some costly breaks; each tanned his private leather, each killed his private snakes. And now the kings, anointed with mica axle grease, find all the world disjointed, and can‘t en- joy our peace. WALT MASON. STOLEN FROM THIEVES It was at the door of a store which had advertised exceptional bargains for that day, in the jam, that Mrs. Blank saw Mrs. Brown and rushed to shake hands with her and say: “‘Oh, Mrs. Brown, are you here?’’ “Yes, Iam here., but I did not expect to meet you.’’ “Why, you see, I am going to join the new league and I am getting ready for it.’’ “Tt is the Woman’s league where we pledge ourselves not to buy a hat or a gar- ment costing more than $10?’’ “Yes, that is the one and I am getting ready to join, too.’’ DR. C ALLEN, Pentist;, Examination free, oJ. 9211 Globe Bldg., 1st and Madison. Office hours 9 to 12 a. m., 1 to 6 p. m., Sun- days by appointment. Residence 1830 24th Avenue. East 6419. a DR. F. B. COOPER, Rent!st: 392-3 Empire . Tr. B 9 Bldg, 2nd and Madison. Special appointments for evenings and Sundays. Of- fice hours 8:30 to 12 and 2 to 6. Main 6093, Resi- dence, East 5056. i wants two columns CAYTON’S WEEKLY s7"s,.t¢f.comns made up after thtis style and fashion. Rates very reasonable, Beacon 1910. a STONE, THE CATERER jen: {23! Parties and. ban- quets cheaper than you can do it yourself. Stone's ice cream leads. East 275. ee A And they entered the store together and each bought a dress marked down from $80 to $48, and $20 hats and coats that cost over $60 each. They went out feeling that they could stand by their pledge. The colonel was notified that his unit was about to be inspected by the secretary of war. The captain was ordered to make a preliminary inspection to see that all was in readiness. In one of the huts a mop had been standing, head uppermost, against the wall. The captain (who, by the way, is said to be very shortsighted) on entering the room pointed to the head of the mop and ex- claimed in a loud, sharp tone: “Sergeant, see that man gets his hair cut at _once.’’ The sergeant, taking in the situation, re- marked : “Very good, sir.’’ And, smartly calling out ‘‘Attention!’’ he succeeded in check- ing the tittering and laughter which was on the point of breaking out. Pangs of jealousy were in Miss Coldfoot’s heart when she heard that her late admirer had been accepted by Miss Lovebird and when she happened to run across her in the bargain rush could not resist giving a thrust. “T hear you’ve accepted Jack,’’ she gushed. ‘‘I suppose he never told you he once propoesd to me.’’ “‘No,’’ answered Jack’s fiancee. ‘‘He once told me that there were a lot of things in his life he was ashamed of, but I didn’t ask him what they were.’’ A little boy at school saw his teacher faint and fall. In the confusion it was impossible to keep so many heads cool, and the little ones flocked round the prostrate lady and her sympathetic colleagues. But this small boy kept both his color and his coolness. Standing on a bench and raising his hand, he exclaimed: ‘‘Please, teacher, can I run and fetch father? He makes coffins.’ The peal of laughter which greeted this uncon- scious humor roused the teacher from her short trance, and nobody enjoyed the young- ster’s saying more than she did when the circumstances were explained to her after- ward. John McCormack, the famous tenor, tells a story which he claims graphically illus- trates the horrors of war. On returning from a Red Cross concert he was amazed to find his wife laboriously trying to re- move the spots from a Palm Beach suit. ‘“Where’s Norah?’’? demanded the amazed songbird from his perspiring wife. “She’s in the kitchen. I thought I’d do You Are Welcome To Spend Your Leisure Moments at the GREAT NORTHERN POOL AND BILLIARD HALL Cigars, Tobaceo and Soft Drinks. Courteous Treatment BOYD & WILLIAMS, Props. 1032 Jackson St. a this myself, because the poor girl simply can’t stand the smell of gasoline since the chauffeur enlisted.’’ ‘ when a peadter invaded nis private sanc- tum and began dilating on the merits of an ash sifter, “T don’t want an ash siftre,’’ snorted the lawyer, “‘but I do want to know how you got in here.’” “Every one needs an ash sifter,’’ per- sisted the peddler, ignoring the question. “But I don’t. I burn gas.’’ “But you smoke, don’t you?’’ demanded the peddler. “You win!’ cried the attorney. ‘‘I know now how you got in.’’ “TIow?”’ questioned the perplexed ped- dler. “Just sifted in,’? was the laenoie reply. The boss called his typist to his room. “Miss Keytap, you are a very pretty young woman.’” “Oh!’’ said Miss Keytap, blushing. “You dress neatly and you have a well modulated voice. I might add that your deportment is also above reproach.’’ “You shouldn’t pay me so many compli- ments.”” “T only want to put you in a cheerful frame of mind,’’ said the boss, ‘‘before tak- ing up the matter of your spelling and punctuation.”’ “Waiter, a beefsteak! Quick! I’m in a hurry!” “We haven’t any beefsteak, sir!’’ “*A chop then.’’ TB. ON, “Well, then, an omelet.’’ “Impossible, sir, we—’’ “What! why, have you nothing at all in your restaurant ?’’ “Yes, sir, we’ve got the constables.’’ Customer (sharpening his knife on the edge of the plate) —‘‘Then let’s have one.’’ A party of gentlemen at a hotel were telling stories one night recently of famous shots and how many quails, partridges, ducks and other birds had been killed at a single discharge. After listening to what seemed a willful exaggeration by different narrators, a stranger who was present volunteered his experience of his only use of the fatal double barreled gun as follows: “T went into the field one day to try gunning. The only game discovered was an immense flock of blackbirds. I should say there were 10,000 in the flock. Slowly T crawled up to them, and when not more than four rods away the birds rose in a solid mass. I fired both barrels, and how many do you think I killed?” Different guesses were made by the party, ranging from twenty to 100. “Not one,’’ said the stranger, ‘‘but I went out with my brother to look for the results and picked up four bushels of legs. T had shot a little under.” This was the last story told. Mrs. Biggs was fair, fat and 40. She stood now at the entrance to the lions’ sec- tion at the zoo watching the keeper at work. ““*Ere, Prinee!’’ called the keeper. Prince came forward in a slow and stately manner, and graciously received his half a pound of steak. “Surely !’? she interposed, ‘‘that is a very small piece of meat for the lion!’’ The keeper’s eyes twinkled. “Perhaps so, ma’am! It may seem a small piece to you, but it’s heaps for the lion!”? he said. “T hear the grocer fired ye for swindlin’ Phone 2647 1034 Jackson Tailors and Cleaners. Clothes called for and delivered. Hats retrimmed and blocked. Hi. S. Frazier C. W. Curtest side of the scales I put it, an’ it weighed against himself.’’ In the conservatory during the Twelfth Night Ball. Reginald—‘‘ Now that we are alone, Claire, I can ask you a question that I have been burning to ask you all the evening.’ Claire (overcome with emotion)—‘‘Oh, Reginald!’’ Reginald—‘‘Ever since I entered the ball- room T have felt that my necktie was slowly ereeping over the back of my collar, and the thought of my appearance made me miserable. Tell me, Claire, is my necktie all right?” A young man summoned for examination by a draft board claimed exemption on ac- count of his eyes. He had been told of various methods employed by the doctors to detect men who were evading service and was determined not to be caught by them. “‘Read the letters on the wall,’? com- manded the chairman. “Where is the wall?’’? the young man asked. Here is a bit of conversation that occurred between scenes during the making of a recent picture. It was between two women, one of whom had a little bit better part than the other. “Please remember,’’ said this one, who, by the way, was a trifle thin, ‘‘that I am the woman star of this picture.’’ “Yes, I know,’’ said the other, eyeing the long, slim figure, ‘“‘but you’d look better, my dear, if you were a little meteor.”’ The old lady was looking for something to grumble about. She entered the butcher’s with the light of battle in her eyes. “‘T believe you sell diseased meat here?”’ “‘Worse!’’ replied the butcher blandly. ““What do you mean, worse?’’ demanded the astonished patron. “The meat we serve is dead!’’ confided the butcher in a stage whisper. “Now, Lieut. Tompkins,” said Maj. Blank, “you have the battalion in quarter column, facing south—how woudl you get it into line in the quickest possible way facing north?’’ “‘Well, sir,’? said the lieutenant, after a moment’s fruitless consideration, ‘‘do you know, that’s what I’ve often wondered!’’ Mrs. Shrill—‘‘So you won’t get me that new hat for New Year’s gift?’’ Mr. 8.—‘‘No, I won’t.”’ Mrs. S.—‘Very well, then, I’ll go to every temperance meeting that comes along and people will think the reason I ain’t decently dressed is because you’ve taken to drink.’’ i An Englishman had a horse which had been matched against one of Pat Malone’s horses, met with an accident and broke its leg. The owner sought out Pat and, telling him that his horse had fallen sick and might not be able to run, proposed to forfeit half the stakes to be off the race. Pat agreed with unexpected readiness, and the money was handed over. When this had heen done the Englishman remarked: ‘‘T got out of that business very well, for my horse broke his leg.’’ “T got out of it better,”’ replied Pat, “for my horse is dead.’’ RICHARDSON’S UNDERTAKING PARLORS Embalmer and Funeral Director 1216-18 Jackson Street Office, Beacon 103; Res., Main 5610 IN THE SUPERIOR COURT OF THE STATE OF Washington for King County. John J. Shirley, Plaintiff, vs. Jesse W. Rawlings, and Mabel Rawlings, ‘his wife, and) Emma 1. Rawlings, Defendants.—No. ......... Summons and Publication, The State of Washington to Jesse W. Rawlings, and Mabel Rawlings, his wife, and Emma. Rawlings: You and each of you are hereby summoned to ap- pear within sixty (60) days after the date of the first publication of this summons, to-wit: sixty (60) days after the 29th day of March, 1919, and defend the above entitled action in the above entitled court and answer the complaint of the plaintiff and serve a copy of your answer upon the undersigned at- torney for the plaintiff at his office below specified in Seattle, King County, Washington, said King County being the place designated by ‘the plaintiff as the place of trial of said action, and in case of your failure so to do, judgment will be rendered against you according to the demand of the com- plaint which has been filed with the clerk of said court. The object of the above entitled action is to fore- close a certain mortgage executed by the defendants Jesse W. Rawinigs and Mabel Rawlings, his wife, bearing date the 17th day of December, 1906, and filed for record in the office of the Auditor of King County, State of Washington, December 23, 1908, in Volume 424 of Mortgages, page 315 of the Records of King County, Washington, whereby there was mortgaged to the said Emma T. Rawlings the fol- lowing described real estate situate in King County, State of Washington, to-wit: ‘The north twenty and six one-hundredths (20.06) feet of Lot two (2) and the south nineteen and ninety-four one-hundredths (19.94) feet of lot one (1) in block one (1) Leschi Heights Addition to the city of Seattle, together with all and singular the tenements, hereditaments and appurtenances thereunto belonging or in any way appertaining. That said mortgage and notes were duly assigned, transferred and set over for a valuable consideration by the said Emma_T. Rawlings to said John J. Shirley, the plaintiff herein. That said assignment of mortgage was dated the 23rd day of September, 1918, and duly recorded in the office of the Auditor of King County, State of Washington, on the 28th day of January, 1919, in Volume 760 ‘page 460 of the Records of King County, Washington. The object of said action is to exclude defend- ants therein and each of them from any lien or interest in said property and otherwise as will more fully appear from said complaint. JOHN J, KINNANE, ‘ Attorney for Plaintiff. Office and Post Office Address: Hotel Seattle, Seattle, ‘Washington. First publication March 29, 1919. Last publication May 10, 1919. IN_THE SUPERIOR COURT OF THE STATE OF ‘Washington for the County of King.—No. 133363. Summons by Publication. J._Abe Fisher, Plaintiff, vs. Fred Therriault, and William Fisher and Eve S. Fisher, his wife, De- fendants. The State of Washington, to the said Fred Ther- riault, Defendant You are hereby summoned to appear within sixty days after the date of the first publication of this summons, to-wit, within sixty days after the 1st day of February, A. D. 1919, and defend the above en- titled action in the above entitled court, and answer the complaint of the plaintiff, and serve a copy of your answer upon the undersigned attorney for plaintiff at his office below stated; and in case of your failure so to do, judgment will be rendered against you according to the demand of the com- plaint, which has been filed with the Clerk of said court. The object of the said action and the relief sought to be obtained therein is fully set forth in said complaint, an. is briefly stated as follows: To partition the following described real property: The Hast Forty-five (E. 45) feet of Lots Highteen (18), Nineteen (19) and Twenty (20) in Block Thir- teen (13) of Front Street Cable Addition to the City of Seattle, King County, Washington. ANDREW J. BALLIET, Attorney for Plaintiff. P. O. Address: 320 Railway Exchange Bldg., Seattle, County of King, Washington. First publication Feb. 1, 1919. IN _THE SUPERIOR COURT OF KING COUNTY, State of Washington.— In the Matter of the Hstate of Erick J. Hdlund, De- ceased.—No. 24729. Notice to Creditors. i. Notice is hereby given that the undersigned has been appointed Executrix of the Estate of Erick J. Edlund, deceased, that all persons naving claims against said deceased are hereby required to serve the same, duly verified, on said Mary M. Edlund, or on Andrew J. Balliet, her attorney of record at the address below stated, and file the same with the Clerk of said court, together with proof of such serv- ice within six months after the date of the first pub- lication of this notice, or the same will be barred. Date of first publication Feb. 8, 1919. MARY M. EDLUND, Executrix of said Estate. Address: 320 Railway Exchange Bldg., Seattle, Wn. ANDREW J, BALLIET, Attorney for Estate. 320 Railway Exchange Bldg., Seattle, Wash. First publication Feb. 8, 1919. put them on the day before yesterday, and they look all right to me.’’ “Never mind how they look!’’ replied the soldier. ‘‘You just take them shoes off and put on other ones. Me and Private Spriggs will stand the expense.’’ “What has Spriggs got to do with it?’’ ““We’ve got a bet on how many times you can fool with that there mule’s feet before you gets laid out.’’