The American Citizen

THE AMERICAN CITIZEN. Afro-American News For Busy People. Houston, Tex., was the scene of the first Negro lynching for the year of 1906 when Harris a Negro was lynched on the charge of having killed a white man at Moscow. Prof. W. T. Vernon, President of the Western University at Quindaro, Kans., has been named for Register of the U. Treasury to succeed Judson W Lyons he will doubtless be confirmed. Mrs. Harriet A Turner wife of Bishopbury M. Turner of the A. M. E. church in Philadelphia Pa. on the 11, he was a widow of Bishop Wayman of the A. M. E. church. Mrs. Mary McDonald age 135 years died on the 6th at the Home for the aged and Infirm in Philadelphia. She was the oldest woman in America. It is said that Stephen Bates of Virgines, Vermont an intelligent Negro has been chief of police and sheriff of at place for 26 consecutive years. The number of lynchings for last year was 65; the smallest reported since 1885, which time the press began to get statistics on this particular subject. In 1942 there was 87 lynchings; 1903, 104; 196; 901, 135; Of the 66 lynchings it occurred last year only one was in North that one being in Nevada. Of total number lynched 65 were Newes, Mississippi furnishing 20 of these statins, Louisiana 6. Thirty-four were searched for murder and 15 for miscellaneous reasons. A well know characrer. The death of G. U. S. Hovey at White church, Kas., last week removed from the mist one of the best knn. n men in the country. A familiar figure in the critical history of Wyandotte county or many years was he. One by one the said old pioneers are crossing to the other side-new actors are stepping upon the stage of action. Jim Crow High School As was the expectation, the Supreme part of Kansas decided against the Negroes in the suit against the establishment of a Jim Crow High school. The session not only g ves the Board of Education in this city the rights to separate but paves the way for separation throughout the state. It is not so much the separation but the inferior schools that will be established and the cutting up of the curriculum of studies. Equal utilities have not as yet been established and doubtless will not be the white cases claims he knows best what the Negroes need and along that line he labors all else to the contrary. Just as expected. The bottom has about fallen out of the "joint" business in court thus comover the oft repeated. That the people in Kansas City Kan., do not want a city town. the District Court of Wyandotte county 县. Parah Hall, Plaintiff. vs. Henry Hall, Defendant. To the above named defendant: you are hereby notified that you have been sued in the above named court, by the above plaintiff, and unless you appear and answer on or before the 2nd day of November A. D. 1905, the petition will be taken as true, and a pleaded statement thereon, the nature of which will be a decree dissolving the bonds of ninety existing between plaintiff and deriving plaintiff and awarding to her, her manner name, Sarah Everett, and for cost of this suit. I. F. BRADLEY, Atty. for Plaintiff. Arrest. Win. Needles, Clerk. First Pub. Oct 13. Publication Notice. In the District Court of Wyandotte County kansas. Peter Seaman, Plainoiff. vs. Anna Seaman, Defendant. The above named defendant will hereby take notice that she has been sued by the above named plaintiff in the above hamed court, and that unless you appear and ans- swer on or before the 1st day of February, the petition filed against her will be taken as true and a judgement rendered the nature of which will be a decree dissolving the bond of matrimony existing between the plaintiff and defendant, and divorcing him from her the said defendant, and for cost of this action. I. F. BRADLEY, Atty. for Pliff. Letters: Wm. Needles, Clerk. LOCALLY. Deputy Sheriff Jno. W. Wilson, has been presented with a beautiful gold watch chain by the Washington Temple International Order of Twelve for the strenuous efforts put forth by him in behalf of this great body. Mrs. Thad Fuleher of 726 Walker av. has returned from Chamois, Mo, where she spent a few days with her parents. Mrs. Geo. Gordon of 347 Armstrong ave. and baby have been very ill for several week we are please to learnt that they are improving. Rev. Geo. McNeal pastor of Pleasant Green Baptist church will leave this week for Des Moines, Iowa, to assist the Rev. F. C. Lomax of the First Baptist church in that city. Miss Lulu Calaway of 201 Franklin ave. will leave in a few days for Atchison where she will attend high school. Mr. John Fontaina of 218 Garfield av. who has been on the sick list is able to be out again. Geraldine Williams little daughter of Estella Travis left the city Sunday for Parson where she will attend school. Mrs. Amanda Brown of Neb. ave., is one among the prominent members of the Sons and Daughters of Jerusalem. For five years she has been Most Excellent Queen Lodge No. 80. She has made an excellent presiding officer and is still retained at the head. Her efforts are commendable in the highest sense and eminently entitled to all the honors bestowed upon her. Mrs. Ella Koontz daughter of Mrs. Lulu Johnson-Summers is quite ill on State avenue. Mrs. Fannie Reams who has been quite ill at the residence (the sister of Mrs. Austin on Minnesota) is unhappy. Mr and Mrs. Geo Hubbard of the Sea Foar block spent last week in Sedalia among relatives THEY SAY Its the same old story. And were you at the Sunday Forum. Whats on the political horizon. No. 5 went to a fire recently on two wheels they had four but two were invisible. Tall man at No. 5 and the short man have days off in succession. The dressmaker is not on lower Minn. ave. now. It was Custer's Last Fight, Ha! Ha! It is—no it isn't, Ha! Ha! “Twix love and duty.” The scene—on Oakland ave.—Time, Sunday night. If the xrays could be turned on some people some nights—we would have some racy reading about people in—society. Can shooters union had a meeting and added some female members. Funny he goes to the show alone. Who tis? that the wedding bells continue to ring. Is it really true now that selfish people live in the Sea Foam block. Since the professors and school marms left the popular block it is a dead one. Who is it that South Main St. has no charms for now. It was Sixth St. in Kansas City where they went we are afraid to say. Give her a call. When need the service of a Notary public and typewriter Miss Mary E.King Room 26.6 Portsmouth Building is at your service. Residence 1119 Freeman Phones: Bell 1246 W. and Home 111 W. She is deserving of your patronage. Mr. Henry Martin, a wealthy Englishman, who recently married pretty Miss Mona Dedman a colored waitress in Springfield, Mass., considers his marriage nothing out of the ordinary. It will be remembered that black and white marriages are not considered a novelty in the European countries. If any line is drawn at all it is done on the wealth position and character. A person with good character, no matter what race or nationality he belong to, he is held in highest esteem by those who are acquainted with him.—Ex. KANSAS CITY, KANSAS FRIDAY EVENING, Politically Speaking Will Judge Freeman run again for Probate Judge it is an awful nice place to hold on to. Lou Chapman is talked of for political honors It is said Dr. Richmond the present councilman of the 2nd ward will not run again. Political fence building is now on—Spikes must be plentifully used. Practically assured that Mayor Rose will resign. Al Berger is spoken of for the legislature. Will Balie P. Wagoner speak of the injustice to the Negro in his—"Square Deal address". Col. D. E. Cornell the present County Treasurer is mentioned as a good one for mayorality timber. John Warren may be the Democratic nominee for county attorney. Is it true that Mayor W. W. Rose will resign and try it again. "STORY OF THE EVIL SPIRIT." "The Story of the Evil Spirit" Astley D. M. Cooper's celebrated Indian painting is on exhibition at the store of Jones Dry Goods Co., this week. Many have availed themselves of the opportunity to see this realistic picture, and it is certain that larger crowds will visit the gallery as the beauty of the painting becomes better known. Mr. Cooper, who lives at San Jose, l., has devoted the greater part of his artistic career to the delineation of Indian scenes. Besides the large painting Jones Bros.' are a number of smaller pictures of Indian life. There are several ideal pictures which are well worth study. "The Story of the Evil Spirit," which sold for $20,000, is painted from an incident in the Indian war. A group of Sioux Indians and two captive girls, sisters, are about a fire in a treepe. An Indian who has just arrived is telling the message which the medicine man asserted had been delivered to him by the evil spirit. The captive girls, not undersrstanding his words, believe that he is telling of the torture prepared for them, and their faces depict their fear. The beauty of the painting depends in large part upon the light effects which the artist has secured. There is the glow of the campfire and through a rent in the wall of the tepee and through the open door streams the moonlight. The contrast of these two shades of light is wonderfully brought out by Mr. Cooper the red glow of the campfire on one side and the soft moonbeams upon the other. A smile or two. A girl may be named "Pearl" are still be a "peach". Some people would rather make a mistake than to miss steak. It takes two to make a matrimonial bargain, and three to break it up. If women could change their complexions as easy as they can change their minds they would be much happier. Speaking of the necessity of regular exercise—Did you ever hear of a woman losing the use of her tongue by lack of it "A school teacher wrote the following sentence on the blackboard for the benefit of the young grammar class: "The horse and cow is in the lot." She waited quite patiently for some one in the class to tell her what was wrong with the sentence. Finally little Sammy in in the back row held up his hand: "Well, Sammy, tell us what is wrong with the sentence." "Please, Ma'm, you should put the lady first," was the reply. Sleeper's Real Offense. An eccentric minister caused some surprise one Sunday by declaring that he did not in the least object to people sleeping while he was preaching. A few minutes later he and his hearers were disturbed by the loud snoring of a man just below the pulpit. "Give him a tap on the head," said the minister. This was done, ineffectually, "Give him another," came the order again. Still the man slumbered. But at length by dint of much tapping and shaking, he was recalled into abashed consciousness. "You are making a wretched noise," roared the minister, leaning over the pulpit edge. "I don't mind your sleeping, but you are preventing other people from sleeping!" NOTE LETS. Nice furnished rooms at 1512 N. 3rd st. at reasonable rates, Mrs. J. Bolden, proprietress. A New Restaurant just opened at 1010 N. 3rd St. where you can be served to good meals cooked to your taste at the low figure of 15 cts. a meal. Give them a call. Miss Etta Scott the wonderful lady evangelist of our city leaves tomorrow for Iola, Kansas. FOR SALE—A bargain in a No. 1, Upright piano $250 when new, mandolin attachment, call at this office and inves tigate the bargain. FOR RENT—To desirable parties (gentleman preferred) well furnished rooms in one of the best families in the city, inquire at this office. If you want a whole lots of the best quality of goods for the least quantity of money go to A. L. Sumerwell's store at 440 Minnesota ave. FOR RENT—Nice Furnished Rooms at 423 Oakland avenue, Mrs. Annie Williams. The Preacher and churches. Rev. W. M. Jackson of 1610 N. 4th st. has pastorage charge of the both Baptist churches in Edwardville, and Eudora Kas., he is doing excellent work. Rev. P. M. Mack, pastor of Morning Star Baptist church at Kimball and Howard Sts., is pushing rapidly ahead in his glorious work. The churches are rapidly assuming a metropolitan air in this city, as well as being pastored by a more virtual class of ministers. The Mt. Pleasant Baptist church is now being heated and lighted by natural gas, entertained by an excellent choir and music from a piano and organ. Rev. J. R. Richardson, is the progressive pastor. King Solomon Baptist church under the pastorage of Rev. H. H. Gordon, is moving onward and upward. Pleasant Green Baptist church under the pastorage of Rev. Geo. McNeal is an advance house of worship. The St. James A. M.E.church is pastored by a man who dons overall and jeans and hustles with a shovel as good as any member of his flock, when it is necessary-That's Rev. A. M. Ward. braktar. What is commonly called the island of Gibraltar is not an island at all, but a peninsula connected with the mainland of Spain by a flat, sandy isthmus. It is a solid rock of limestone, stretching north and south, three miles long, three-fourths of a mile wide at its widest part, and the highest point is 1,396 feet above the sea. Output of Diamonds. During the last twenty-three years the output in rough diamonds of the South African mines has been approximately $414,000,000, the value of these diamonds when cut *counting* to $828,000,000. This output is approximately 35 per cent of the total product of all the diamond-bearing countries in the world. Valuable Slate Deposits The most valuable slate deposits in the world are found in the central part of the state. In the neighborhood of the Pennsylvania quarries there are houses whose walls are entirely of slate. The blocks of which they are made are smoothly sawed, and are most substantial. Desert of Gobi. The Desert of Gobi occupies a considerable portion of central Mongolia, but it is not a true desert, supporting as it does nearly all kinds of animal and vegetable life and forming no small part of the pasturage of that greatest grazing country of the old world. Right Sort of a Girl The Cincinnati girl who married a poor young man who thought her poor also and then informed him after marriage that she is worth $500,000 seems to be of the good old American variety of girl who was not in the market for counts of no account. Reaching out one of the committee halls said: "Sir, I wish to thank your attention to that grave. The man who lies buried there had to be provided with the largest coffin ever made in this city." The honored guest thanked his host not so much for the information as for relieving the strain.—Pittsburg Dispatch. PUBLICATION NOTICE In the District Court, Wyandotte County, Kansas. Albert Whiteside, Plaintiff, vs. No. 19286. Lizzie Whiteside, Defeudant. To Lizzie Whiteside, Defendant: You are nereby notified that you have been sued by the plaintiff above named in the District Court of Wyandotte County, Kansas, for divorce, and that you are required to answer the petition of the plaintiff, filed in the office of the clerk of the District Court, Wyandotte County, Kansas, on or before the 22nd day of January 1906, or said petition will be taken as true and a judgement will be taken for the plaintiff, granting him an absolute decree of divorce from you, and for such other relief as the nature of said decree. Require. DURSEY GREEN, Atty. for Plaintiff. Attest: Wm. Needles, Clerk. By D, C, McCombs, Depnty. Publication Notice. Wittie court of Common Pleas af Wyan dose County, Kansas. More Mary Bradley, Plaintiff, vs. Otis Divers. and Ida Divers. Defendant. To the above named defendants you are hereby notified that you have been sued in the above named court, by the above named plaintiff, and that unless you appear and answer on or before the 20th day of January A. D. 1906, the petition filed against you will be taken as true and a judgement rendered against you the nature of which will be a force foreclosed a certain mortgage, given on the defendant Otis Divers, on the follow- er described property, as will:—The south half of the North half of the South half and number of section twenty of township eleven of range twenty four, in Myrtlewood County. Kansas, excluding youth and each of you from all interest in said land, and ordering the sale of safe and in formation of said judgements and for costs in this action. Publication Notice: name District/county state of Bancroft state of Kennebunk The State of Iowa is treating to William Rogers you will notice that on the 44th July of April 1951 that the sell above named plaintiff had petitioned to the Distriat county that it abused state and county of action against you. Cause of action is -Churg- you with either a conviction or in cause Action is charged with 6th cross nerror or heresy objection on before the 1st day of 1951. An unjustified proof the plain- tiff will be granted proof as prayed for in her tiff will be granted proof as prayed for in her L. W. JOHNSON Attest by Clerk of District Court, on 6 day of Oct. 1903. Wm. Needles, Clerk. By D. C. MeCombs, Deputy. NOTICE. State of Kansas, County of Wyandotte 148 NOTICE. In the District Court of Wyandotte County, State of Kansas. Lawrence Jones, Plaintiff. vs. Elsie Jones, Defendant. The State of Kansas greeting to the above named defendant, you will take notice that on the 18th day of October, 1905. Said Plaintiff above named has filed his petition in the District Court of Wyandotte County, State of Kansas. A petition against you asking for a divorce, seteing forth 2 causes of Action No.1. Gross neglect of duty and extreme cruelty. And unless you answer denur or otherwise object on 3rd day of December 1905 The allegations in said petition will be taken as true and upon further proof the Plaintiff will be granted the divorce as prayed for in said petition. L. W. JOHNSON, Atty. for Plaintiff. Attested by Clerk of District Court, on 16th day of October, 1905. Wm. Needles Clerk of the said Court of Wyandotte County Kansas. per D. C. McCambs Deputy. Administrator's Notice. In the Probate Court in and for said county. Notice is hereby given that Letters of Administration have been granted to the under-signed, on the Estate. William Bryant late of said County, deceased, by the Honorable, the Probate Court of the County and State after said, dated the 30th day of Dec. 1905. Now, all persons having claims against the said Estate are hereby notified that they must present the same to the undersigned for allowance within one year from the date of said letters, or they may be precluded from any benefit of such estate; and that if such claims be not exhibited within three years after the date of said Letters, they shall be forever barred. ANNA MILLER Adminiftratrix of the Estate of William Bryant, deceased. In witness whereof, the undersigned. Probate Judge in and for the County of Wyan dottie. State of Kansas, have hereto set my hand, and affixed the seal of the said Probate Court this 30th day of Dec. A. D. 1905. Winfield Freeman, Probate Judge. Dec. 22nd. The Wit of Woman Women are the inheritors of the oldest, most universal human wisdom. They have more sense than men, for the simple reason that a man has to be a specialist, and a specialist has to be a fanatic. The normal man all over the world is a hunter or a fisher or a banker or a man of letters or some silly thing. If so, he has to be a wise hunter or a wise banker. But nobody with the smallest knowledge of professional life would ever expect him to be a wise man. But his wife has to be a wise woman. She has to have an eye on everything.—G. K. Chesterton in the London Daily News. Indian Remedy for Coughs A decoction of cherry bark and spruce bark, boiled and strained, is an old Indian remedy for coughs, which has been largely sold under various names for years by venders of patent medicines. The white trapper nowadays dissolves spruce gum in alcohol, adds a certain proportion of the spirits to the bark mixture and sweetens the whole with maple sugar. Perhaps the most experienced chemist could not prepare a better cough syrup than this makes. Shylock's Prized Turquoise We all remember reading of poor Shylock's despair and indignation upon learning that his turquoise ring had been exchanged by the gay young Jessica for a chattering monkey, when he tells us: "It was my turquoise; I had it of Leah when I was a bachelor; I would not have given it for a wilderness of monkeys." Which passage shows the antiquity of the turquoise as a love-pledge. Rich English Counties Lancashire, England, is the next richest county to London. It is rated at £24,000,000, against London's £43,500,000. Largest Deposits of Nickel. The largest deposits of nickel are on the island of New Caledonia, a French possession in the South Pacific. Women Carry Malls. Many of the rural letter carriers in the Tyrol are women. Motoring as a Tonle. That eccentric genius, the late Frank Buckland, the naturalist, when he felt fagged took a railway journey, and, having armed his eyes with spectacles, hung his head out of the window, and avered that the perfect aeration of the lungs which he thus obtained was the finest stimulant he had ever discovered. Motorists experience the same invigorating effects of traveling at speed through the open air. One of the most enthusiastic "chauffeurs" in England was, and has been for some time, under the treatment of Sir William Broadbent for indigestion and nervous prostration at the time he invested in a motor car. From that day the doctor's occupation has ceased so far as this automobilist is concerned, as he now enjoys the most perfect health, and he puts this down entirely to motor driving—London Daily Mail Agile Boer Ponies. Most of the ponies, for they are rarely more, that the Boers ride, come from the Free State and all have Basuto blood in them. The Basuto pony is to South Africa what the Welsh or Scotland pony is to Great Britain, as sure-footed over rocks as a goat, and with an ability to leap from crag to crag like a chamois. A Basuto on his pony will come at a good pace down a mountain side that an 24 pine climber would be careful in negotiating. Thanks to the Basuto blood in their ponies, the Boers can move in small parties over the mountainous country, raiding farms and driving off cattle over the hill path. Nothing would please the small boy more than the privilege of assuming the role of father to the man occasionally. the time to Subscribe For the Weekly American Citizen. ~ American Citizen — The Oldest Negro Journal Published ‘Weekly in this part of the Country. at 1510 North 3rd Street KANSAS CITY - - - - - KANSAS. W. C. Martin, Editor, Geo. A. Dudley, Publisher and Business Manager. Terms of Subscription in Advance. iss Veils cjscassssse sacs i SLO0 Six Months, ......cscccssssceeees O50 ‘Three Months. ......-s..ss0cee+++-40 Deeg MODI .5- oh. gicss-<sneseeae cole ‘Advertising 25 cents per inch First Insertion. ‘A Standing Display ‘Ad’ for 3 Months or longer 15¢ per inch, each insertion. What with high finance and chorus girls this is a bad year for million- aires, ‘The king’s cup has filled the cup of the New York yacht club full of joy to overflowing. ‘The Northwest Passage has been found, but it doesn’t appear to be good for much, after all. ‘The tallest shaft in the cemetery won't prevent a man from being for- gotten after he is dead. Death is a mistake, according to a young female lecturer in New York. So many of us make it, too. Notwithstanding Mark Twain's ven- erable appearance, the heart of him seems to be as young as. ever. That alleged comet which the pa pers announced, has gone. It was only a little celestial fuzz, anyway. It isn’t really hard to quit smoking; the onfy difficulty is to avold changing one’s mind, and taking it up again. About all there is left for Lord Rosebery is to sit on the fence and throw stones at both parties as they PS Thee Rochester Globe prints this scare headline: “Robbed in a hotel.” Such an obvious statement to put in @ head! Mark Twain says he doesn’t believe in exercise. Evidently he has never ‘had to frame an excuse for beionging to a golf club. Mme. Calve says Milwaukee is “a bum town.” We are sorry that Mil seapfirtalecpmta tone Gates erin Tae G5 print en At Coweta eel Be. “Give your stomach a vacation,” says an advertisement. Lord, don’t we wish we could! When our stom ach goes, we go. ee The height of the atmosphere is 109 miles, but there is so little of it, five or six miles up, as to take one’s breath and freeze one's ears. faerie The Chinese have a game called “chefa,” which is said to be very much like policy, even to the detail that the ‘Chinese printers play it. A Chicago woman refused to pay for ‘& new coat because she said it made her look like a camel. Chicago wom- en like to hump themselves. Owing to a sudden attack of influ enza, Mr. Tellum Whott has been forced to defer writing his article on “How to Avoid Catching Cold.” It must not be forgotten that Mme. Bernhardt presents a more conspicu- ous mark for egg throwers now than she did in her younger and leaner days. ' A young woman in New York has coyly owned to being 2,000 years old. ‘This is a whole lot safer than mention- ing a limit that looks suspicious on the face of it. ‘The Emperor of China is talking of going abroad. Perhaps the dowager empress has been looking in his hand and informing him that he is going on a long journey. ‘The Chicago typewriter girl was has dust inherited a fortune of a million dollars will continue to work as a ste nographer, but hereafter she won't take much “sass” from the boss. Mark’ Twain’s moderation in making it his practice never to smoke more than one cigar at a time will be com- mended by everybody, with the possi- ble exception of the tobacco trust. Capt. Bernier says he would not go to the North Pole in a balloon. The Cap. has seen icebergs at close range and has an inward presentiment that they would not be desirable things to fall on. The dyspeptic who is ordered by his physician to walk five miles a day, and who recovers his health by tollowing the advice, ought not to complain because he has to have soles put on his shoes. It is this way with the man at the races: If his pony wins he will have @ pony of brandy after a good dinner, but if the horse he bets on sails in loser, then he will have a schooner with his sandwich. MADE IT A DIFFERENT CASE. Nuisance Turned Out Largely a Mat- Gat dt Quiles Mrs. Russell Sage is one of the most active workers. in the movement to abolish the dockifg of the tails of horses. In a discussion of this movement she said recently: “If the horses already docked were out of the way we should have no trouble in putting a stop to docking forever. But many persons, advocates ot our movement in the past, no, soon- er buy a pair of showy carriage horses with docked tails than they ‘desert us and go over to the enemy.” She smiled sadly. “It is the old story.” she said. “White owned a dog. Black, who lived next door, came to him and said: “‘Look here. That dog of yours howls so much at night that my wife and I are going mad for want of sleep. “‘Is that so” said White. ‘I hadn't noticed his howling. I think you must be mistaken.’ “A week passed and Black came home one day with the objectionable dog on a string. “I have bought this cur,’ he told his wife, ‘I have bought it from White and I am going to chloroform it? “Another week and White, the dos’ former owner, said to Black: “*You haven't chloroformed tha’ dog yet, have you?’ “Why, no not yet, ‘Black answered “The fact is we have grown rather fond of the critter, he is so playfu and affectionate.’ “‘But doesn’t his barking anno; you?’ White asked. “‘No, I haven't noticed it, sai Black. , “Well,” White grumbled, ‘T can’ sleep for that brute‘s continual yow! ing.’ Mrs. Sage smiled again. “In the case of ourselves it is on thing; in the case of others it is a dil ferent matter,” she said. Love for the Old Home. Mankind is nomadic, and while the sweetest poetry in the language is in- spired by the old home, the monu- mental work in the world has been ac- complished in the main by those who left the parental roof to pursue else- where the quest for fortune, fame and high success. Nevertheless, the love for the old home abides. The re- union of those who remain and those who have departed is an occasion that will stir the pulse of any com munity in which such a soulful event takes place. The pretty announce | ment was made by a newspaper in a little New England town which was about to celebrate its old home week that “the Jones boys have arrived and Charles will preach in the Pres byterian church on Sunday” A little waif of news like that revives old times and pays for all the prepara- sion of “old home week.’—Philadel phia Ledger. Surplueace. Owen Wister, the novelist, was crit. icising the work of a literary begin ner. “Now, here,” said Mr. Wister, slash- ing his blue pencil througa an entire manuscript page, “here is arrant sv: perfluity,and surplusage. In what way do these 400 words help your story? “In no way. On the contrary, they hinder, they impede it. These written words are mere surplusage, as so many of our spoken words are mere surplusage. They resemble the use- less questions that we ask. “A man stood before a mirror in his room, his face lathered, and an open razor in his hand. “His wife came in. She looked at him and said: “Are you shaving?” “The man, a foe to surplusage, re. plied fiercely: “No; I am blacking the kitchen range. Where are you—out driving or at a matinee?’” Look for Action from Senatar. According to general belief Mr. Knox of Pennsylvania does not mean to be a silent member of the United States senate’ at the coming session. As a rule newcomers are rather ex- pected to keep in the background for a time, but Senator Knox is tacitly booked to take a leading part in dis. cussion of the railroad rate measure. For many years Pennsylvania sena tors have almost confined themselves to committee activity. The vamer- ons, father and son, were silent men, and so to a great extent was Mr. Quay. Mr. Penrose, too, rarely opens his lips, so the spectacle of a Penn. sylvania senator active in debate will be somewhat of a novelty. ae Minty fea hess wearin Te pe me These, weartsome ‘wintry, dayat Gimme the old-time chimbly, ‘The back-log an’ the blaze! Trang to sit where the oak-fre gleams, An’ tell old stories, an’ dream old dreams! ‘The steam-heat—it says nuthin’ ‘The stove hides dreams frem sight; But the flames of the open fire Sing songs of a winter might! Gettin’ there, where the bright ight streams, I tell old stories, an’ dream old dreams! Youth comes back with Its roses As I dream by the fireside late. ‘The face of the old-time sweetheart In the starlight at the gate!— Old-times—old loves, in ‘the firelight’s gleams— ‘The old. sweet story—the old sweet dreams! —Frank L. Stanton in Atlanta Constitu- tion. Under Arrest, but Unquarded. ‘While Gen. Brugere, commander of the French army, was under fifteen days’ arrest in Paris he was not per. mitted to leave his quarte:s on any pretext except to transact official busi ness at the war office, might not wear his sword and could receive no vist tors. But in consideration of his high rank no sentry was placed over him. MEN HAVE HORROR OF DIMPLES. Willingly Pay Money for Removal of “Beauty Spots.” Female scoffers. who deny that men have been blessed by nature with so seductive a charm as a dimple will chango their tune when they hear what the beauty doctor has to say on the subject. “Dimples are just as common among men as among women,” says that apostle of the good advantage. Beard and mustache combine to hide their charm. Anyhow, men are not proud of dimples. They consider them a sign of effeminacy. Now that smooth faces are the fashion, the man with a dimple in cheek or chin is hard put to it to hide that beauty mark. In his extremity he seeks relief from me. “What can I do with these devilish dimples?’ says he. “‘Take ’em out, I advise. “Can you do it? he asks. | “‘Sure,’ says I. “ ‘all right, says he; go ahead.’ “Then I begin treatment. In the past year I have removed sets of dim- ples from men's faces that any woman of their acquaintance would! have paid $100 for. All men with money to spend patronize the beauty doctor more shamelessly than they used to; out of all the miracles they wish rerformed there is none they insist upon so stoutly as the removal of dimples.” 8 HAPPIEST AWAY FROM POMP. Austrian Emperor Finds Rest in So- ciety of Grandchildren. Although Francis Joseph of Aus- tria is a central figure in the most ex- clusive of European courts his din- ners are quite informal in tone except on rare state occasions. Usually his majesty converses in the liveliest man- ner with his guests, In the smoking- room, to which he almost. invariably accompanies the men, he joins in the general chat, laughs at the jokes and shows marked preference for the frankest replies to his questions. Since the tragic death of his son and wife the emperor leads a solitary life for a eteater portion of the year. In sum- mer, however, he makes his way to his lovely villa at Ischl, in the beautiful {alzkammergut and here-is surround- jed by his daughters and their children, ‘It is then that pathetic old man is hap- ‘piest, playing “grandfather” with the babies, taking walks with them and forgetting for a brief season the trials ane sufferings, misfortunes and dis- appointments which life has brought im, ] Sed cbaicta’ Mak a Must all thy songs be mother songs, My bonny baby" boy? : Da poets write no other songs, Grjat father's name Cupiey? Why, then, I'll right the monstrous wren: Come, boy, and hear thy daddy's song. But fist a toes high tn the alr, ito heat tir mosy shace And then a'ticile here and there, To bring the dimples out, ORO SREB "He RRA de Now, then, wee barefoot boy, take care! Run swiftly o'er the floor, And Tater’ be brim ‘bear, ‘nd gruel and bite and pain! Why, plese us. boy, what almey. sure! Dad's song 1s tag time, sure enough There, now of peg ‘we've had our fill, ae guanle. # ae ai know. tun!) alow Serg bright’ his‘ eyes are. stl “Hush, baby: mine, by-low!™ Come! come, ott litle rascal you, Dad's’ had “énough' ot” peek-a-boo! Hush. hush, my boy, to sleep with thee! (1 wish his mammy'd come!) crhy father cusn into a ‘bee if fonger he must hum. Ah, well, to lull a child to rest, AMimother ‘Sons, perehanen se beat —Boston Transcript. Blue Dogs With Pink Taile. “I will never forget my first experi- ence in hospital work,” said Chief Sur- geon Millar of the Central emergency hospital. “There was a green nurse in the detention ward and we had a very violent case in there—a man in the worst stage of delirium tremens, { was awakened in the middle of the night by the head nurse, who request- ed me to come at once to the patient. When I got there I found him raving and very violent, with the new nurse seared out of her wits. I said: “‘Why did you let him go so far; I left you some medicine to give him as soon as he got delirious.’ “Yes, doctor,’ she replied; ‘but you told me to give that to him if he saw any more snakes, and this time he was seeing blue dogs with pink tails.’”"— Exchange. Graded Christianity. In a certain church in Greater New York the children of the rich have Bible-lore instilled into their youthful minds on the level of the church ftoor, while the infantile poor are taught who the fathers of Abraham were, in the basement. “Who teaches the children up- stairs?” a certain young and enthusi- astie church worker, whose duties lay delow, was asked. “Oh, they have rich teachers up there,” was the reply, but her tone was a little wistful.’ “What income must a child's par- ants have before it can be admitted to the room upstairs?” This was not ascertained, Accepted the Authority. The late Frank F. Heard, for many fears a prominent member of the Bos- on bar, was the author of a work on aw which was much used and quoted oy lawyers. He was once trying a tase the opposing lawyer being Gus- nvyus Somerby. Mr. Somerby made iis aigument, when Heard suddenly aid: “That is wrong. What is your mthority2” “F. F. Heard, page —,” replied Somerby, “Oh, well,” said Heard, “if Heare ays so it is so.” And the case pro- ‘eeded, with much amusement on the tart of the spectators. NEAT AND EFFECTIVE REBUKE. Give the Lie Direct. Senator Foraker was contradicting a certain statement. 5 “Though this is a firm contradic. tion,” he said, “I want it to be a pleas- ant and polite one. It is not neces- sary, when men tell falsehoods, to call them liars and club them over the head. Their error can be pointed out in neater and more graceful ways. “For instance: “In a small town in Indiana a group of drummers were assembled. They sat in the reading-room of the coun. try hotel. On the fitmsy hotel paper they had finished writing to their firms with the lumpy ink and the rusted pens which the hotel manage ment provided, and now, with news paper reading and desultory talk, they whiled away the tedious evening. “A young drummer in a red tie took the cigarette from his mouth an¢ said: “ ‘Well, my day’s sales here reache¢ 35,000. Not bad for a small town, eh? “An elderly drummer looked wy ‘from his newspaper and said quietly: ““Not bad at all. It is wonderfu what one can sometimes do in thes ‘little places. On my last trip here my commissions came to just what you say your sales did.’ “The young man reddened. “This isn't a lying competition,’ he said gruffly. “Oh, excuse me,’ said the other ‘f thought it was. ” Story of a Medford Warrior. Capt. James C. D. Clark of the Lawrence Light Guards of Medford, Mass., was a speaker at a recent camp fire of civil and Spanish war veterans, and related the following story: A Medford man, a quaint character of Irish birth, returned from the civil war with an undisputed record of hard and meritorious service in the army. The younger generation, hearing of bis bravery, tried unsuccessfully to get his own version of his part in the bloody struggle. One day, finding himself besieged by a number of persistent questioners, the modest warrior consented to speak. “We'd get up in the mornin’ at 5 o'clock,” he began, “an’ have break- fast. Begin fightin’ at 6, knock off at 12. Begin shootin’ agin at 1, knock off at 6 an’ ate supper, an’ turn in to sleep. Every day the same old thing; that’s all.” he Shehinn Wiistinst: Chanute There is no chance of a signalman making a mistake at Wanstrow Sta- tion—the smallest on the Great West- ern railway—for the simple reason that there are no signals, and, conse- quently, no signalman, The station is situated on the Wells branch of Som- ersetshire, between Witham and Cran- more, a Structure COnSISUNE Of a plat. form about 24 yards long and a small waiting room. In the waiting-room is a fire grate, and on the platform one lamp. No station master, porter, or other staff is kept at Wanstrow, the station being under the supervision ot the Witham station master, who pays occasional visits to the place to see that everything is in order, In the winter a platelayer makes a fire in the waiting-room, attends to it dur- ing the day, and lights the platform lamp when necessary.—London Tit Bits. Snuffbox in Her Stocking. Tt was a sunny day and several pas. sengers on the ferry boat were sitting on the outside benches, One middie aged, quietly dressed and obviously respectable woman sat alone. Pres ‘ently she reached down, pulled up her ‘skirts and drew a small box from out of her stocking. She opened the box end took therefrom a pinch of snuff This done, she replaced the box in her stocking and fastened her garter The pungent odor of snuff pervaded the air, but the woman appeared un concerned to the point of defiance, “Well!” exclaimed one man to him. self or anybody who chanced to hear him. “I wouldn't have believed it {f I hadn't seen it."—New York Press, The cauke oa ‘The starry silence falls Along my ‘sylvan way; A apirit ‘watks the, earth fe never meet by day And listening to the volce Of years that are no more, My feet—O, Imow'st thou why?— Have wandered to thy doot, ‘The quiet, taper burns, And makes thy casement bright, And soft thy shadow falls Between me and the light; 1 gaze as_on-a shrine Siy"heart "would bend before: My couch had seen ‘no rest, lad I not seen thy door! The Night, as if to breathe, Her starry curtain parts; ‘The very alr seems taint ‘With breath of lovers” hearts; Some spirit robes the earth In light that heaven wore; Or is that light thine own? And is that heaven thy’ door? Charles “Swain. Acknowledged Expert on Diamonds. ‘The credit of being the greatest dia mond expert in America is generally awarded to Gen. Mindil, who for ten years has had charge of the jewel. room in the appraiser's office, New York. The importer who can bam. boozle Gen. Mindil as to the value of a precious stone has not yet come to the front. Wores Than an Enidenic?. Dr. Heber Jones, to whom the citt- zens of Memphis recently presented a purse of $10,000 for his care of the quarantine this year, has weathered five epidemics in the city and yet it is recorded that he was “sreatly em- barrassed” when the leading woman who presented the check kissed him full upon the Ics. Telephone Bell W. 32. Telephone Home W.2 : | W. B. Raymond FUNERAL DIRECTOR and Embalmer. The very best of Service, Fine Carriages for alll Purposes, at all Hours. The Best Equipped White Enameled Ambulance for sick and wounded on Short Notice. Charges Reasonable. Cail at 431 Minne. sota Ave., Kansas City, Kansay. ca A a ee eae ee ee West Uni it THE GREAT EDUCATIONAL INSTITUTION FOR KANSAS AND THE WEST - - - . « DEPARTMENTS :—Theological, College, Normal, Sub-Normal and State Industrial. COURSES:—Classical, College, Preparatory, Normal, Sub-Normal, Mu sical (Instrumental and Vocal), including piano, organ and har mony, Drawing (Fine Arts and Mechanical), Carpentry, Printing and Book-Binding, Business Course, Stenography and Typewriting, Tailoring, Dressmaking and Plain Sewing, Cooking, Laundering, Farming and Gardening. ADVANTAGES:—Splendid Location, Healthful Climate, Good Influ- ences and Thorough Teachers. INFORMATION:—For terms, prices and all inducements offered, write to WILLIAM T. VERNON, A. M., D. D. PRESIDENT, | QUINDARO, - - - - - KANSAS. ‘Otfice—Bell—‘White” 4302. Phones. Residence—Bell—“West” 15, oe Why does colored people as well as uncolored peoplet set in the dark or by a smoky poor light and drink muddy bad water full of disease germs, When they can get a first-class Bright Gas Burner Light For 35 to 75 cents. Anda Self Cleaner Water Filter that makes the water clear as a Crystal and Healthy. For 50 to 75 cents. : A. J. SHERIDAN ROOM 8, pen MINNESOTA AVE. KANSAS CITY, KANSAS, “In the shade of the Old Apple Tree” is a very popular song—Why not you be popular by trading at a popular store? L. J. MADDUX, : Staple and Fancy Groceries Meats and all Kinds of Produce. HOME PHONE 784 WEST. 852 FREEMAN AVE. KANSAS CITY, KANSAS. go ee In an Excuse Book. ‘foal aR sae | Because its employes were late a London house provided a book in which the tardy ones were to write excuses. Reasons for lateness were not much varied. At the top of the page one would write “Train delayei,” or “Om- nibus horse died,” as the case might be, and the rest fell into the habit of making ditto marks and letting it ®o at that. But not long ago one man had a new excuse, He wrote with pride: “Wife had twins.” The Second slow person that morning was in a great hurry, and did not notice the innovation, but made his custo. mary ditto marks, and the rest of the men on that page followed suit. The excuse book was abolished. Example of the Postage Stanp. The late Judge Andrew Wylie, of Virginia, had a fappy gift of illustra- tion. The judge cast in 1860 the only vote for Lincoln that was given in Alexandria, Va. In an address on Lincoln he once illustrated in an odd way the power of perseverance. “Lin- coln persevered,” he said, “and it is only those who persevere, they who concentrate their energies, who gue- ceed. Don't give three years to jour- nalism and then, discouraged, try the Jaw awhile. Don’t learn the grocery business and in a little while take up placer mining or plumbing. Consider, rather, the postage stamp, whose use- ful depends on its ability to stick to one thing until it gets there.” | Think What a Family Then! “Well,” saiq the first policyholder, throwing aside his paper, “there is at least one thing we can be thankful for concerning our Mutual friend, Mr. McCurdy.” “What's that?” inquired the second policyholder. “That he isn’t a Mormon.” Res, 420 Nebraska ave. Tel. 383 White SOUTH AMERICAN MEDICAL INSTITUTE Office Hours: From 10 a. m., tili 4 p.m and from 6 till 9p. m, C.H, C. JORDAN, M. M., M. D. Here is the Place J. T. Roberts TONSORIAL PARLOR All the Latest Style Hair Cuts, Clean Shave strictly Up-to-Date 438 MINNESOTA AVE. "An Old French Sailor. French seamen have a dozen in the Person of a centenarian. The oli sailor belongs alike to the navy and to the merchant service, for he served in both, and it would be difficult ‘0 say in which of the two his adventures were the most thrilling, His record fneludes three shipwrecks, the battle ‘of Navarino, in which he won met tion in orders, the blockade of Algiers, one capture by brigands, followed by himself and his companions seizing th? Spanish ship which captured the cor sair which haq captured them. Aftet serving many years before the mast he became a master and small ship owner on his own account. His name is Pierre Loirat. He was born ia November, 1805, and at 12 he went see Once on a time, in far-off Japan, There lived a busy little man, So merry and so full of fun That people called him In-door Sun. Now, In-door Sun made mirrors fine, Like those in your house and in mine, And these looking-glasses bright His own face was from morn till night. It made him feel so very sad That see his face look cross and bad, That he began to take great care To keep a sweet smile always there. And soon he found that those he knew All seemed to like him better, too; For, like his mirrors, every one Began to smile on In-door Sun. Now try this just one day and see How bright and smiling you can be; You'll find both happiness and fun In playing you're best game!" -Inez G. Thompson he room nervously, a lie in her eyes, a lay in her cheeks. He drew aside the expectantly down home after four or long years of g. And he was with success. She his going away mettle with the enge fortune, but and fears as to the are friends all their she had been the like a caged tigress the time of waiting did not seem long to her as times of waiting usually are. He was coming. That was enough. And the riot of her emotions so enthralled her that she scarcely craved aught else. Then the jangle of the bell; a breathless moment or two full of heart-throbs and sounds of doors opening and closing, low voices in the distance, and he stood before her. In the moment it required to gain composure her quick eye took in approvingly the figure before her. He had changed greatly and for the better. All the callowness, all the sophomoric amateurishness had vanished Zorro "I am so sorry," she said. "I did not know—" and instead he had acquired a rugged personality, a strong manhood, a dominating something, which she felt rather than saw. There he stood, tall, stalwart and browned and in his eye the sparkle of anticipation and tenderness. She spoke his name and took him by the hand and she noted involuntarily his approving glances as he took in the change in herself. "By Jove, Bess, you're a stunner," he said taking both her hands. "If it were not for your eyes I wouldn't believe it was the same girl who used to help me make day dreams." The scarlet leaped to her cheeks and her heart beat so hard she thought he must hear it. Then they sat down in a cosy corner and he told her of all his struggles and achievements and prospecs; told her in the same old whimsical way, so interesting in its contrasts of quaint humor and pathos, of childlike simplicity and keen intelligence, of boundless faith and intuitive judgment. As he revealed himself to her she realized with a glow of conscious affinity that he was the same old Howard of the dear old days. When he had done with his story she told him in the most charmingly deprecating manner in the world of her own good fortune and the boundless opportunities which had come to her with the acquisition of the golden sesame of ample wealth. His joy and enthusiasm at her disclosure knew no bounds and his congratulations were so warm and sincere as to imply the closest personal friendship. "By the way, Bess, I have not told you of the best of my good fortune," he said, still holding both her hands which he had not released after grasping them in congratulation on her good fortune. "Not only have my efforts been rewarded with every reasonable material success, but Cupid, also has smiled upon me. I am indeed the most blessed of men. The dearest, sweetest, daintiest girl in all the world has smiled upon me and we were married last Thursday and are now on a bridal tour. It was a very quiet affair and I did not let you know because I wanted to give you a surprise. Oh, how you will love her. You will be sisters I know. She is an impossibly helpless bit of femininity and needs just such a strong, resourceful woman friend as you to lean on and learn from. You will be the best of friends I know. You will come and call on her at the Metropole to-morrow and we will have a genuine three-cornered reunion and the best of it is I am to remain here. The company has given me charge of its general work and allowed me to select my own location and I have determined to establish myself here so Ethel and I can be near to you. Isn't it splendid?" Her hands had gone cold in his and the blood had pushed back on her CAST IN (Copyright, 1905, by the girl paced the room nervously, a t of impatience in her eyes, a t of expectancy in her cheeks. r and anon she drew aside the arms and peered expectantly down he was coming home after four days of absence—four long years of lug and hoping. And he was grown crowned with success. She numbered well his going away ar to try his mettle with the aid and to challenge fortune, but at with doubts and fears as to the home. they had been rare friends all their cool days and she had been the infant of all his ambitions, hopes fears. True they were not ened that was impossible because he his way to make in world and must secure a hold before he could even a thought to matrimony. often had talked it over in the tract—not with reference to ourselves or their relations, but with grace to his life plans. But she regarded him as her own parnarknight and was sure he would be back to claim her when victory crowned his efforts. here had been nothing of love- ing in their relationship, but rath- er a spirit of comradeship and close friendship and both were so young so absorbed with the other affairs that they had thought little or ing of the grand passion. was after he had gone away that girl's heart awakened and the great discovery of her love had glor- the world. It was this knowledge which had made her value so highly unexpected legacy which had to her upon the death of Uncle She would bring to him no in portion when he came to claim and she tingled with joy at the night that this would help him scale heights so much quicker and eas- little correspondence had passed ween them and that wholly in refec- tion to his work. and now he was coming home. Not with ultimate victory emblazoned his banners but yet with enough amplified to feel that his feet were the rocks and that, barring sickness or misfortune, his career was dead. And she awaited him all in with joy and anticipation. She retired herself with great care for aversion. She knew the simplicity its tastes but wanted to show her a good fortune while she concluded him on his. So she selected a gown of simple but but of richest material and in sweet taste. Only two or three girls, but those priceless, shone on back and hands. The mirror to which she made her final appeal for annual, gave back a reflection which M. W. sufficed her most critical and relent- less inspection. Now surprised he would be to find a elegant and graceful woman in one of the immature and unconvenient girl he had left. Her heart was not changed, and she laughed a triumphant little laugh. She was not a seam or a scar upon and her mind was as fresh and amurished by worldliness as when went away. She scarcely could believe that the beat moment had almost arrived, but Clock told her it was nearly here of her whole body thrilled and glow with strange and sweet emotions her quivering heart beat a tat against her breast. Though she paced back and forth # heart until she was like to falt. Her dreams lay before her, dead ashes. But, brave soul that she was, she forced a smile to her bloodless face. "I am so sorry," she said in low distinct tones. "I did not know—you did not let me know, you see—and I am starting on a long journey—abroad—to the orient, to China and Japan—and Australia I have become so restless and pleasure-loving, you see, since I became rich. And all the arrangements are made and I start to-night. I am so sorry not to meet your—wife—and you must give her my very best wishes and—and my love and hope for her—and your happiness." "But you will return soon," he responded agast. "Sometime, maybe, but not soon," she replied hysterically "you have no idea what a restless fly-about I have become. I may be gone for years. And now I must go and get ready to start because the time is short. You did not let me know, you see and I had all my plans made. Good-bye and God bless you—and—her." After he had stumbled out amazed and puzzled, she flung herself on a lounge and lay sobbing for hours. Then she rang for her maid and ordered a hasty preparation for a long journey. FOUND THE POSITION FILLED Tramp Unsuccessful in Pathetic Role of Returned Wanderer. His knock on the door of a certain house was answered by a demure little woman, and he felt quite sure of a cold bite as he led off with: "Madam, do not think me impertinent, but let me ask if it so happened that you had a son wander away from the family fireside years ago?" "Yes, I did," she replied, as she opened the door a little farther. "He went out into the world and became a wanderer o'er the face of earth?" "Yes, he did." "Days and weeks and months ran into years and you heard no word of him? You knew not whether he lived or died?" "As you say, I knew nothing," replied the woman, as she stood in the door and looked fixedly at the tramp. "Well, ma'am," he continued, "I don't want to raise any false hopes, but—but—" "But you are just a little too late!" she finished, as he swallowed the lump in his throat and tried to wipe away a tear. "My wandering son returned about two hours ago and is now taking a soak in the bathtub. Had you called early this morning, you know—" "Then the situation is filled?" "It is." "Just my luck, ma'am; but of course you are not to blame for it. I congratulate you and your wandering son, and will bid you good-day and try the family next door."—Philadelphia Telegraph. Before a school teacher lay a number of compositions, all written in a neat, upright hand. "Few people," she said, "know to whom we are indebted for the straight up and down penmanship now taught in our schools, and few grasp the superiority of this style. "Upright writing was originated by Drs. Von Reuss and Lorenz of Austria. They recommended it to the Austrian Supreme Council of Hygiene. They pointed out that it was the better style of writing to teach children for the reason that a child using it would face his book and would thus be spared the twist of the body and neck which is always observed in those who write the slanting hand. This twist, they showed, had a tendency to bring on spinal curvature. "The recommendation of Dr. Von Reuss and Dr. Lorenz was adopted in Austria, and upright writing was finally adopted there. May it live forever."—Los Angeles Times. Decided Slump. The great man was disturbed in mind. "Henry," he said to his private secretary, "have I done anything unpopular, lately?" "Not that I am aware of, senator," responded that functionary. "Does there seem to be any prejudice taking shape in the public mind against me?" "I know of none." "Am I spoken of in a sneering manner by the public prints?" "Not so far as I have observed. Why are you asking me these questions, senator?" "Because, Henry," said the great man, "I am convinced that unfriendly influences are at work. You know there is a brand of five-cent cigars named for me, I presume?" "Yes, sir." "Well, they are selling them now two for five cents." -Chicago Tribune It is the day for overflow Of my deep sorrow's cup in rills. Alas! we should pay as we go! It is the dismal day of bills. A battered iceman wants his pay; A stormy milkman says I owe; The gasman seems to plan a stay; The man seems to be sooooooo. Here is the bill from Squibbs & Co. For powders, tonics, soap, and pills— A half we needed not. I trow, It is the dismal day of bills. The paper boy won't go away; The grocery man looms up a foe; A butcher holds me fast at bay; A waggish baker speaks of "dough." My tailor comes. He says I'm "slow." My cook comes. He says I'm "slow." My simple, honest heart with woe, It is the dismal day of bills. ENVOY. My boy, I've traveled to and fro. And known the grip of divers ills; Behold, I say, Fate's direct blow; It is the dismal day of 1915. New York Times LAUGHS BY THE WAY LAUGHS BY THE WAY SAMPLES OF HUMOR GUARANTEED TO CAUSE A SMILE. Kindness of Neighbors Unappreciated by Mrs. Banger—What Principally Interested the Tramp—Danger Always in Flirtation. Veiled Sarcasm. The Frenchman in the American restaurant had struggled for ten minutes with a piece of alleged tenderloin. At last he called the waiter. "I understand," he remarked sarcastically in excellent English, "why you call this tenderloin." The waiter stood, puzzled and attentive. "The word," continued the indignant guest, "is a hybrid compound, made up of the English word 'tender' and the French word 'loin,' which means 'far.' Tenderloin therefore means 'far from tender,' does it not?" —Chicago News. Ahead of Her. Ahead of Her. Caller—I've come to tune the piano Mrs. Banger—I didn't send for a piano tuner! Caller—I know it; but the neigh bors did. A Gentle Knock. "Come into this store with me a minute," said Deepley. "I want to buy you a good cigar." "Oh! see here," protested Cheepley, "don't get the idea that you have to do that just because I gave you a cigar yesterday. Besides, I don't smoke." "I know. I just want you to keep this good one in your pocket until the next time you feel like giving me a cigar." A Natural Inference Six-year-old Fanny, just returned from Sunday school, seemed to have something on her mind. "Mother," she said after awhile. "they must have had very large beds in Bible times." "Why?" asked her mother. "Well, our teacher told us to-day that Abraham slept with his four fathers."—Harper's Weekly. Danger in Any Elirtation. "There is no harm in an innocent flirtation." "I don't know about that. I know a fellow who tried it and the first thing he knew the girl had him married." More Important. First Tramp—Here's a magazine called "What to Eat" that I just found. Second Tramp—Does it tell you where to get it?—Philadelphia Bullein. The Fickle Fair. "What's the matter?" "I was making love to my sweetheart last night and her father came suddenly into the room." "Well, that was awkward, but hardly heart-breaking." "Wasn't it? The old man merely remarked that it was a pity she couldn't stick to the same fellow two evenings in succession. Then he left." Not in Buoyant Spirits. Mrs. Shark—I'm afraid my poor husband is doomed to pass the rest of his life on the surface of the sea. Mrs. Halibut—Goodness, gracioust Wat in the world has happened? Mrs. Shark—About ten days ago he ate a man's leg off before he discover ed it was a cork one."—Puck. Tinned Tabby. MOLROW! Miss Oldbird has had a suit of armor made for her cat Phoebe. Phoebe can now stroll forth into the night without the slightest possible danger of returning with a compound fracture of her wishbone. ANTI-GRIPINE IS GUARANTEED TO CURE GRIP, BAD GOLD, HEADACHE AND NEURALGIA. I won't sell Anti-Gripine to a dealer who won't Guarantee It. Call for your MONEY BACK IF IT DON'T CURE. F. W. Diemer, M. D., Manufacturer, Springfield, Mo. PILES NO MONEY TILL CURED • CAD FOR FREE TICKET • TRADEMARK OF DRIVERS DRIVERS TRETHORN & MINOR • 1031 ST. JEWELS CITY, MO. (SMALL OFFICE AT 31 LONES) CHILDREN AT CHRISTMAS. We watched the trooping children paly About the old house, once so gray And still. Then darkness fell, And one by one they said farewell. The music and the laughter stopped, The play was done, the curtain dropped, The waning lamp of mirth burned low With each last cry across the snow, And we, Old Friend, were left alone! What was it lost, that we had known? Old Friend and True, must even we Find nevermore what used to be? Man lives by change; through ebb and flow The new lives come, the old lives go; We lose and gain, yet year by year The aging heart grows more austere. It may be that the strain and stress Of our mad times tempt joylessness; It may be that our feverish days Forget the old more genial ways; It may be, too, the ashes of Dead hopes and dreams have smothered love! But plain it stands, no more we hold Earth's fond good-fellowship of old! Yet thanks to one small spark, Old Friend, As down the Dusk of Things we trend, Age shall not strip our weary heart Of all its old congenial art! Aye, thanks to each small voice and light That lend its youth to us to night, And thanks to that strange fugitive Enduring Love by which we live, Thro' childlike eyes and childlike act We yet shall hold our youth intact! And thanks to one still jovial day We still, Old Friend, shall make our way By thought and Mem'ry through the snow, To Youth and that lost Long Ago. Made all our days seem Christmas tides! — ARTHUR STRINGER Lewis' Single Binder costs more than other 5c cigars. Smokers know why. Your dealer or Lewis' Factory, Pooria, Ill. In Hard Luck. Tramp—"Please, mum, I just arrived from Dakota. I'm a blizzard sufferer, mum." Housekeeper—"Se here, it ain't been three weeks since you told me you just arrived from New Orleans, and were a yellow fever sufferer." "True, mum. I hurried right on to Dakota to get shut of yellow fever, and I got caught in a blizzard, mum." Ask Your Druggit for Allen's Foot-Ease. "I tried ALLEN'S FOOT-EASE recently and have just bought another supply. It has cured my coms, and the hot, burning and itching sensation in my feet which was almost unbearable, and I would not be without it now."—Mrs. W. J. Walker, Camden, N. J. "Sold by all Druggists, 25c. To Make a Horse East Meadowgrass—"SI Oatcake seen a advertisement fh th' Bunco Bulletin what sed ter send on er dollar an' git instructions as wuz guaranteed t' make enny slow hoss fast. So he took an' sent th' money." Corntasel—"An' did he git th' instructions?" Meadowgrass—"I low he did. He got a postalcard on which wuz written in red ink: 'Don't feed him.'"—Chicago News. TO CURE A COLD IN ONE DAY Take LAXATIVE BROMO Tablets. Drug-related money if it falls to Urease. E. W. GROVE's signature is on each box. 25. To Be Expected. Customer—"See here! All the buttons came off this coat the first time I wore it." Dealer—"Yah. So many beoples admire dot coat, you swell up mit pride and burst dose buttons off." Mrs. Winslow's Soothing Syrup. For children teething, softens the gurus, reduces inflammation, allays pain, cures wounds colic. Zoe a bottle. It is an art to paint a work of art and it is still mor of and art to sell it. Piso's Cure cannot be too highly spoken of so a cough cure—J. W. O'BRIEN, 323 Third Ave. N., Minnesapolis, Minn., Jan. 6. 1900. "Is she a 'miss'?" "No! she is a hit. She's a widow with two millions."—Judge. Every housekeeper should know that if they will buy Defiance Cold Water Starch for laundry use they will save not only time, because it never sticks to the iron, but because each package contains 16 oz.—one full pound—while all other Cold Water Starches are put up in ¾-pound packages, and the price is the same, 10 cents. Then again because Defiance Starch is free from all injurious chemicals. If your grocer tries to sell you a 12 oz. package it is because he has a stock on hand which he wishes to dispose of before he puts in Defiance. He knows that Defiance Starch has printed on every package in large letters and figures "16 oz." Demand Defiance and save much time and money and the annoyance of the iron sticking. Defiance never sticks. It is a terrible nuisance to have a reputation to live up to. PRICE. 25 Cts. TO CURE THE GRIP IN ONE DAY ANTH-GRIPINE THAS NO EQUAL FOR HEADACHE Yours for Health Lydia E. Parkham Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound is a positive cure for all those painful ailments of women. It will entirely cure the worst forms of Female Complaints. Inflammation and Ulceration. Falling and Displacements and consequent Spinal Weakness, and is peculiarly adapted to the Change of Life. it will surely cure. Backache. It has cured more cases of Female Weakness than any other remedy the world has ever known. It is almost infallible in such cases. It dissolves and expels Tumors in an early stage of development. That Bearing-down Feeling causing pain, weight and headache, is instantly relieved and permanently cured by its use. Under all circumstances it acts in harmony with the female system. It corrects Irregularity. Suppressed or Painful Periods, Weakness of the Stomach, Indigestion, Bloating, Nervous Prostration, Headache, General Debility, Also Dizziness, Faintness. Extreme Lassitude, "don't-care" and "want-to-be-leaf-alone" feeling, excitability, irritability, nervousness, sleeplessness, flatulency, melancholy or the "blues," and backache. These are sure indications of Female Weakness, some derangement of the organs. For Kidney Complaints and Backache of either sex the Vegetable Compound is unequalled. You can write Mrs. Pinkham about yourself in strictest confidence. LEDIA E. PINKHAM MED. CO., Lynn, Mass. Not Running Insurance Company. "How'd ye like to hire out to me this spring, Jabez?" "I'll do it if you'll hire my two boys. Kin ye do that?" "I kin, but I don't propose to. I'm runnin' a farm, not a life insurance company." Rival Forces. "No; I must confess that I didn't enjoy the opera." "Why the papers say that all the singers were in very good voice." "True, but so were the people in the boxes." WOMEN WHO SUFFER WOMEN WHO SUFFER Dr. Williams' Pink Pills the One Remedy Particularly Suited For Feminine Ills. To women who suffer Dr. Williams' Pink Pills are worth their weight in gold. At special periods a woman needs medicine to regulate her blood supply or her life will be a round of pain and suffering. Dr. Williams' Pink Pills are absolutely the finest medicine that ever a woman took. They actually make new blood. They are good for men too—but they are good in a special way for women. "It was three years ago last spring that my health failed me," says Mrs Arthur Conklin, of No. 5 Coldwater street, Battle Creek, Mich. "I suffered from leucorrhoea and other troubles that, I presume, were caused by the weakness it produced. I had sinking spells, nervous headaches, was weak and exhausted all the time and looked like a walking skeleton. "My back and limbs would ache almost continually and there were days when I was absolutely helpless from sick headache. I tried one doctor after another but cannot say that they helped me at all. My liver was sluggish and I was troubled some with constipation. "One day a physician who has now retired from practice met my husband on the street and inquired about my health. He advised my husband to get some of Dr. Williams' Pink Pills for me, said they were a good medicine, better for my trouble than he could put up. I tried them, improved steadily and soon was entirely cured. As soon as the leucorrhoea was cured the headaches and other pains stopped. I am entirely well now but intend to continue to use Dr. Williams' Pink Pills as a spring tonic." The genuine Dr. Williams' Pink Pills are sold by all drugstores and by the Dr. Williams Medicine Company, Schenectady, N. Y. If his home were more homelike many a man would spend fewer evenings in the saloon around the corner. Insist on Getting It. Some grocers say they don't keep Defiance Starch. This is because they have a stock on hand of other brands containing only 12 oz. in a package, when the won't be able to sell that because Defiance contains 16 oz. for the same money. Do you want 16 oz. instead of 12 oz. for same money? Then buy Defiance Starch. Requires no cooking. Hope is the process of accomplishing wonders in your mind. Ep cennee Ee RUN) Dae ie pe , ih ' eM S SZ The wonderful growth of Baking is due to its moderate price and the fact that food prepared from it is free from Rochelle Salts, Alum or any injurious substance. All grocers are authorized to guarantee this. Everything in Stock. Mrs. Highart—dreamily—“I wish to select a painting for the—the north- west corner of my parlor.” Dealer —bruskly —“Yes, madam. James! show the lady Senat’s last marine, ‘The Nor'wester.’” Ttilingkala Ba Busine:s Man—“Has Mr. De Chap- pie any balance here.” Banker—“ah, well—y-e-s, a delicate one.” The Value of Ideals. ‘The life of every person will be made better and brighter by choos- ing a high ideal, and then seeking conscientiously to live up to it. The ideal dish for breakfast is Pillsbury’s Vitos, which is full of stored-up en- BENEATH THE MISTLETo&c ‘Twas at a Christmas ball, and there (For all were masked), incognito, I met a maiden passing fair Beneath the merry mistletoe. Of course, ‘tis difficult to tell Behind a mask one’s friend or foe, But, confident and bold as well, I hinted for a kiss, you know. At my request/she whispered low, “That may not be, Sir Masks; I'm married!” hi “Why, so am I; but who's to know?" I asked. She thought a bit, then tarried! That stolen kiss was very sweet, ‘They always are—another, oh! The shaded lights seemed so discreet, Our chaperon the mistletoe! We danceq together till the last, When, all too soon, ‘twas time to 80; And then I fopnd it was my wife Who'd passed as my incognito! We gasped in mutual mute surprise; I know for one I felt de trop; And now we both avert our eyes When some one mentions mistle toe. | MAZIE CARUTHERS. “What becomes of a joke when it gets too old for the almanac?” “The theatrical program gets it.” “And from there it's but a step to the mu. sical comedy, eh?”—Philadelphia Bul- letin, INCIPIENT CONSUMPTION, How Food Headed Off the Insidious Disease, The happy wife of a good old fash- foned Michigan farmer says: “In the spring of 1902 1 was taken sick—a general breaking down, as it were. I was excessively nervous, could not sleep well at night, my food Seemed to do me no good, and I was 0 weak I could scarcely walk across the room, “The doctor said my condition was due to overwork and close confine ment and that he very much feared that consumption would set in. For seVeral months I took one kind of medicine after another, but with no good effect—in fact, I seemed to grow worse. “Then I determined to quit all medi. eines, give up coffee and see what Grape-Nuts food would do for me, -I began to eat Grape-Nuts with sugar and cream and bread and butter three times a day. “The effect was surprising! 1 be gan to gain flesh and strength forth. with, my nerves quieted down and grew normally steady and sound, Bweet sleep came back to me. In six weeks’ time [I discharged the hired girl and commenced to do my own housework for a family of six. This was two years ago, and I am doing it still and enjoy it” Name given by Postum Co., Battle Creek, Mich. ‘There's a reason. Read the little book, “The Road to Wellville.” in et TELEGRAPHIC BRIEFS A report that Gladstone Dowie and his mother had been stricken with serious illness was denied positively in Zion City last night. Addison J. Ray of Janesville, Wis., 95 years old, was found dead in bed. He celebrated his sixtieth wedding an- niversary Sunday last. | Two silver fox skins, valued at $300 are to be shipped from Janesville Wis. to a furrier in Chicago, to be made into a wedding present for Miss Roosevelt. The skins were abtained| from Ontario on a special order. Fire starting from an explosion, de- stroyed the works of the Carnegie Steel company at Greenville, Pa., en- tailing a loss of between $400,000 and $600,000. Two men were burned, but not fatally. Stephen Decatur, Jr, one of the best students at the Naval academy, was put on trial at Annapolis for haz- ing under charges which, if proven, will result in his dismissal, although he is within one month of his gradua- tion. The Wiscynsin Supreme court at Madison, in the case of Emily Stur- ner ys. Emlle Weitemeyer, decided that children of illegitimates are blood relatives of relatives of the il- legimate parénts and as such can in- herit property. The fact that the opening of the American lejzue basball season has been changed to April 17 will not af- fect the Natipnal league, whose open- ing games are scheduled fe> April 12, according to| a statement made by Harry Pulliam, president of the Nat- ional league. Ohio is about to follow Wisconsin's lead in the treatment of railroads within the state. It was announced at Co'umbus that a pronosition aim- ing 2f ‘ho veo) iow of th ps parts. mae Fobakicration, 4% probasiie Sint Sta Railroad Commie sions) Wi) be sacccoded three crmstiigsione ‘The case of He Wing agaiust the Unit totes, involving the Chines> eXGinsod ‘Net, Was Adee In tivor of 4 States in the United Sts ’ » tn Cin Yuis, the c aiding e ce ef 4 Sinise 3 le! th EB tr nt Cw ” whey w her Sead te a ¥ o i seu 1 1 se ship he i InGiane bins heen nat M. te iv conspir | I uss * f Hoatiy, aod ret: fare Governor Hanly. Wickard had fin- ancial dealings with Sherrick, accord. ing to the officials. The body of John F. Kenna has been found at a bridge near the Hel- merich & Richardson farm in Ford county, Illinois. Kenna received a box of whiskey by express at the El. liott office Tuesday and started home, When found the whisky was near the body. The coroner's verdict was death from exposure, A jury in Judge Barr's court in Liv: ingston county, Minois, decided that J. R. Oughton, a prominent resident of that county, haa a right to slaugh- ‘ter deer that he owned and distribute the venison to his friends. This has been an annual custom with him, as he owns a large herd of deer, one of the largest in the west in captivity. Complaint was made to the game wardens that the killing of domesticat- ed deer was illegal, Mary McDonald, a_negress, = claimed to be 135 years of age, is dead at the Home for Aged and In- firm Colored Persons in Philadelphia, Pa. According to Mrs, McDonald and her surviving relatives she was born on Nov. 14, 1770, in a settlement known as Frogtown, near Valley Forge, Pa. She often told of the scenes in and about the camp of Wash- ington’ soldiers at Valley Forge dur- ing the winter of 1777-8. Sir Thomas Lipton is making plans for another campaign against the New Yourk Yacht club next year, and the object will be the American cup, for which the Irish baronet already has tried three times. A letter reaatcaa Lutlaby. Sleepy Uttle creepy little goblins tn the gloaming, With their airy little, fairy little faces all aglow, Winking little, blinking little brown ies gone a-roaming, Hear the rustling little, bustling little footfalls as they go. Laughing little, chaffing little voices sweetly singing In the dearest little, queerest baby lullabies, Creep! Creep! Creep! ‘Time to go to sleep! Baby playing ‘possum with his big brown eyes! Cricket in the thicket with the oddest little clatter Sings his rattling little, prattling little, tattling little tune; Fleet the feet of tiny stars go patter, patter, patter, As they scamper from the heavens at the rising of the moon. Beaming little, gleaming little fire- flies go dreaming To the dearest little, queerest little baby lullabies. Creep! Creep! Creep! Time to go to sleep! Baby playing ‘possum with his big brown eyes!—Talent. A woman's idea of heaven is where she could have half a dozen children without ever having to be bothered with a husband. A New Being. Shepard, 1M, Jan. sth (Spectal)— Mrs. Sarah &, Rowe, who is residing here, says sbe feels like “A New Be- ing.” although she 1s in her fifty-sev- eoth year. Why? because she has takeu Dodd’s Kidney Pills, that well known medicine that bas put new life into old bodies, and bas come as a God-send Into homes of sorrow and suffering. She says:— “No one knows what awful torture I suffered with Rhenmatism und Kid- ney Trouble, until 1 got cured by Dodd's Kidney Pills. This grand rem- edy drove the Rheumatism ont of my body, nothing else ever did me any good. Dodd's Kidney Pills are worth ‘one bundred Umes their price, for they have made me, though 1 am fifty- Seven years old, a new being. 1 am fo better shape now than I have been for many years and 1 owe it all to Dodd's Kidney Pils.” No, Alonzo, a baroer shop and a hack are not necessarily synonymous. Mother Gray's Sweet Powders for Children. Successfully used by Mother Gray, aurse {n the Children’s Home in New York, cure Constipation, Peverishness, Bad Stomach, Teething Disorders, move and regulate the Bowels and Destroy Worms, Over 80,000 tes- simonials, At all Druggists. 2c. Sample FREE. Address AS. Olmsted, LeRoy,N.¥. But the world doesn’t have much love for the lover who loves only him- self. ‘Why It Is the west is because made by un entirely differ- ent process. Defiance Starch is un- like any other, better and one-third more for 10 cents, If a woman is afflicted with klepto- mania she always takes something for it. All Up-ts-vate Housekeepers use Deflance Cold Water Starch, be- cause it is better, and 4 oz. more of it for same money. Some women are so curious they will ,isten to advice just to find out what it’s like. — OPEN PUBLICITY THE BEST | GUARANTY OF MroIr. gen the maker of a medicine, sold fhrough druggists for family uso, takes bis pationts fully into his confidence by frankly and fearlessly publishing broad- cast a8 well as on its bottle wrappers, & fall list of all its ingredients in plain English, this action on his part is the best sible evidence that he is not afraid to have the search light of inves tigation turned full upon his formula and that it will bear the fullest serutiny gud the most, thorough Investigation, Dr. Piereo's Favorite Prescription for the cure of the weaknesces, periodical pains and functional derangements of the or gans dlatinetly fominine, is the only medi cine put up for sale through drugalsts for Wwoman’s special use, the maker of which fg not afraid to take his Patients into his full confidence by such open and honest publicity. A glance at the published ingredients on each bottle wrapper, will show that It is made wholly from native, American, medicinal roots, that it contains no pol Sonus oF habitforming drugs, no nar. cotics and no alcohol—pure, triple-refined ivcerine of proper strength belng used instead of the commonly employed alco: hol, both for extracting and preserving the active medicinal properties found in ‘the roots of the American forest. plants employed. It is the only medicine for women’s peeular diseases, sold. by drug- gists, that does not contain a large per- centage of alcohol, which is in the long Tun so harmful to woman's delicate, nery= ous soo. Now, glycerine is perfectly harmless, and serves. a valuable purpose by possessing Intrinsic value all fts own, and besides it enhances the curative effect of the other ingredients entering into the "Favorite Prescription.” Some of the ablest medical writers and teachers endorse these views and praise ail the several ingredients of whick “Fa vorite Prescription” is composed — rec- ommending them for the, cure of the very same diseases for which this world- famed medicine is advised. No other jpedicing for, women has arty such ‘pro Sessional endorsement—worth more than ‘any number of ordinary testimonials, It interested, send name and address to Dr. R. V. Pierce, Buffalo, N. Y., for his little book’ of extracts from the works of gminont medical writers and Teachers endorsing the several ingredients an telling Just what Dr. Pierce's medicines are made of. It’s free for the asking. ‘ MADE Rugs =£2* Old Carpets ““Hasaes Gray Rae Go. seem tee SE ene Ges ne a "Zon eyearacst Thompson’s Eye Wator W. N. U. KANSAS CITY, NO. 2, 1906. ee eae rai) AEE acl 2a 5 Ba LSE FA Sy e nent deeply econ oe a “CONSUMPTION & DOES YOUR BACK ACHE? Cure the Kidneys and the Pain Will Never Return. Only one sure way to cure an ach- {ng back. Cure the cause, the kid- neys. Thousands tell of cures made by Doan’s Kidney Pills. John C. Coleman, a prominent merchant of Swainsboro, Ga., says: “For several years my kidneys were affected, and my back ached day and ~2\ nicht. I was languid. De te ner eat eter of cures made by Doan’s Kidney Pills. John C. Coleman, a prominent merchant of Swainsboro, Ga., says: “For several yeara my kidneys were affected, and my back ached day and night. I was languid, nervous and lame in the morning. Doan's Kidney Pills helped me right away, and the great relief I found has been permanent. Sold by all dealers. 50 cents-a box. Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo, N. Y. A bachelor hardly ever has as bad ® temper as he would have if he were married. AWFUL ITCHING ON SCALP, Hair Finally Had to Be Cut to Save Any—Scalp Now in Good Condition Cured by Cuticura, “I used the Cuticura Soap and Oint- ment for a diseased scalp, dandruff, and constantly falling of hair. Fin- ally I had to cut my hair to save any at all, Just at that time I read about the Cuticura Remedies. Once every week I shampooed my hair with the Cuticura Soap, and I used the Oint- ment twice a week. In two months’ time my hair was long enough to do up in French twist. That is now five years ago, and I have a lovely head of hair. The length is six inches below my waist line, my scalp is in very good condition, and no more dandruff or itching of the scalp. I used other Temedies that were recommended to me as good, but with no results. Mrs. W. F. Griess, Clay Center, Neb., Oct. 23, 1905,” It takes a girl a long time to learn how to. skate when you have to put your arm around her to keep her from falling on the ice. Defiance Starch should be in every household, none so 00d, besides 4 oz. more for 10 cents than any other brand of cold water starch. Wouldn't Stand Fof It. The local physician had been call- ed in to see the village editor, “Your circulation is poor,” said the M. D., after-an examination. “You're away off there, doc,” re- Joined the scissors wielder. “We secured five new subscriptions this week and only lost two old ones.”— Chicago News. YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO SUFFER From Constipation, Bowel and Stomach Trouble. Q. What is the beginning of sickness? A. ae Q. What is Constipation? A. Failure of the bowels to carry off the waste matter which lies in the alimentary canal where it decays and poisons the et tire system. Eventually the results are death under. the name of some other dis- ease, Note the deaths from typhoid fever and appendicitis, stomach and bowel trouble at the present time. Q. What causes Constipation? A. Neglect to respond to the call of na- ture promptly. Lack of exercise. Exces- sive brain work. Mental emotion and im- Proper diet. Q. What are the results of neglected Constipation? A. Constipation causes more suffering than any other disease. It causes rheu- matism, colds, fevers, stomach, bowel, kidney, lung and heart troubles, etc. It is the one disease that starts all others. Indigestion, dyspepsia, diarrhoea, loss of sleep and strength are its. So vecnis Dees appendicitis and fistula, are caused by Constipation. Its consequences are known to all physicians, but few sufferers realize their condition until it is too late. Women become confirmed invalids as a result of Constipation. = Do physicians recognize thist Yes. “The first question your doctor asks you is “are you constipated?” That is the secret, g Can it be cured? Yes, with proper treatment. The common error is to resort to physics, such as pills, salts, mineral water, castor oil, in- fections, ete., every’ one of which is’ in- jurious.’ They weaken and increase the malady. You know this by your own ex- perience, What then should bo done to cure itt Get a bottle of Mull’s Grape Tonic at once, Mull’s Grape Tonic will positively cure Constipation and Stomach Trouble in the shortest space of time. No other ree. has before pe aoe to sue nstipation positively and permanently. e What is Mult's Grape Pontct u: It is a Compound with 40 per cent. of nasbe ee of Concord Grapes. ie exerts & peculiar strengthening, healing influence ‘upon the intestines, so that they can do their work unaided. ‘The pects ecrsauals but sure. It is nota physic, but it cures Constipation, Dysentery, Stomach and Bowel ‘Trouble. Having a rich, fruity grape flavor, it se eee to take. Asa fonleit is unequalled, insuring the ie against disease. It strengthens and up waste tissue. ny Where ca Mll's Grape Tonic be it A. Your druggist sells it. The dollar bottle contains nearly three times the 50 cent size, Good for ailing children and nursing mothers. A treo bottle to all who have never used $3 Teontaee we kaser tt will care wen, ete: Sar eine ae — FREE. Send this coupon with your name and Portage ahd we wilteapni yen anaes £2400 Youhave never used Aulrs Grape foster aud Will 'sing send you a certidents good for eh W0 Toward the: purchase of more Youle from yous arugetste ‘MULL's Gear Tonto Co., 148 Third Ave, Rock Island, Ill Give Full Address and Write Plainly. $5 cent, £0 cont andsi.00botties tall dragzieta. ‘The sib bostiecontalsn boutsts tes ae seek, uch as te sycent bottio. Thos aa event ‘Soving fa baying tho #00 stze. aoe The wine has a date and number empel on the label—take no other from your druggist. At least once in every man’s career he 1s ambitious to patent some freal invention, AROUSED ses E Baa EEG f SUORT KANSAS ITEMS Neodesha, is to have a Pottland cement plant. Eldorado, has an alfalfa field com- prising 2,500 acres, Dodge City, has a new newspaper called the Daily Chronicle. It is said that Ellinwood has a Jackrabbit canning factory. The Kansas authorities are con- ducting a pure food campaign. Emporia is getting ready to pave and put on other metropolitan airs. Graham county owes only $1,000, the smallest county debt in the state. Superintendent D. F. Shirk of the Newton schools will go abroad next. year. The independent oil refinery at Erie, is now rapidly nearing comple- tion. All the independent telephones lines in Parsons, have been merged into one company, Manhattan has the largest agricul tural college in the world, It has 1,600 students. David M. Bowman of Fort Scott has been elected president of the School Teachers’ association. William Blake has been arrested at Wichita for brutally beating his 11-months-old baby. Cawker City is in high glee over the prospect of getting the projected Salina-Tipton railroad. Pending the land fraud investiga- tons, all homestead proofs in Kansas have been suspended. John Detjen, a Crawford county far- mer, 51 years old took his first ride on a train the other day. Emporia has completed its Carnegie library and has called on Andy for another $2,000 to furnish it. Macksville, women drove a whisky drummer out of that town. They pelted him with superannuated eggs. Hutchinson’s independent salt man- ufactories are planning to have the affairs of the salt trust investigated, George Albin, a Logan county farmer, raised $692 worth of cane seed on land that cost him $480 last spring. Druggists’ liquor sales greatly fell off in Topeka last month, which shows that the joints are doing a bet- ter business, The Leavenworth negro who acct. dentally shot himself with a shotgun he had stolen is dead from the effects o is ‘he office of the ‘be fomaerly was a mem- t ‘sulssiool legislature from rh oe testa on the Union dre veer .awrence and Lea- i th baa ady been named r fark nd the saloonkeep- © of “Soir City eve at outs over the Tyooltio of “pee, and the lid is on tn earnest a a result. #. Rn ‘ McLouth has done the cause Uf anirprofanity a great service by inventing and patenting a stovepipe connector, ‘The Kansas state board of health, which is analyzing various foods in Topeka, says some of the stuff of- fered for sale is vile. The county clerks of Kansas have decided to bring a test ease with a view of securing for themselves 25 cents for each hunting license issued. “An apple a day keeps doctors away,” but the editor of the Conway Springs Star, who has tried it, says one is about as cheep as the other this year. Many Kansas points are complain- ing that a new disease is epidemic among horses. Hundreds of animals have died in the last two months ftom this cause. Mrs. Joseph Garland of Cawker City is an enemy of race suicide. She is proud of her thirteen children and five grandchildren. Mrs. Garland is 37 years old. There is no iikelihood that Kansas will follow New York's example this year hy asking one of {ts senators to resign. The Kansas legislature will not meet unt. next year, Representative J. M. Miller and Vie. tor Murdock of Kansas are after a $25,000 appropriation for the establish- ment of a fish hatchery in Butler county on the Walnut river, The story that Frederick Funston swan the Bag Bag has been eliminat- ed from the hansas school history; but the fact remains practically undis- puted that he waded the Rio Grande. Clay Center citizens are enjoying a vitriolic fight among the newspapers of that town, that is, those who are not mixed up in the fight are enjoy: in git. Henry Van Leeuwen, of Ottawa, controts the cheese output of Kansas, He operates eighteen of the twenty- four plants and ships the finished pro- duct to the seaboard by the train load. Cures Cancer, Blood Poison Scrofula, If you have blood poison p eruptions, pimples, ulcers, ”™. glands, bumps and risings, ,° itching skin, copper-colored’ op rash on the skin, mucous py mouth or throat, falling hat pains, old rheumatism or fou, take Botanic Blood Balm (i, It kills the poison in the blog ‘all sores, eruptions heal, hart Ings subside, aches and pains st. a perfect cure is made of th cases of Blood Poison, For cancers, tumors, swellings Ing sores, ugly ulcers,” persist ples of all kinds, take B. bi stroys the cancer poison in the heals cancer of all’ kinds, curd worst humors or suppurating ings. Thousands cured by after all else fails. B. i. h, posed of pure botanic ingrodieni’ proves the digestion, makes tne pure and rich, stops’ the avful \¢ and all sharp, shooting pains oughly tested ‘for thirty years, gists, $1 per bottle, with compa rections for home ‘cure, Sample and prepaid by writing Bloo Co, Atlanta, Ga, Deseribe troubt free medical advice also sent in letter. aan ae Tn the opinion of Thomas A. p; wonders are yet to be unfolded ig world of electricity, “We are groping on the ver another great epoch in the y; history,” he said in an intervie his laboratory in West Orange, would not surprise me any mo to wake up and learn that some Some group of the 300,000 sci men who are investigating all ovey earth, has seized upon the secr electricity by direct process, ancl gun another practical evolution human affairs. “It can be done. It will be ¢ T expect to see it before I die, “The first great change in the duction of electricity will ab; carrying coal for that purpose,’ said. “Instead of digging gross terial out of the earth, loading ij cars, and carrying it, say, 500 there to put it under a boiler and and so get power, we shall set plants at the mouth of mines, g @te power there, and transmit whereever it is needed by cg wire.” Important to iviothers. ‘Examine carefully every bottle of CAS ‘safe and sure remedy for infants and chi ‘en tse Bears the In Uso For Over 30 Years, ‘The Kind You Have Always Boy Always Danger in Soldier's Li “But, sleeping on your arms 2 after night, is not a great hardst The conscript saluted respecti “Ob, no, sir!” said he. “Our musket, you see, is a combined 1 Ket and folding bed. Of course, t 1s always the danger of the shutting up and smothering one, the Ife of a soldier is never fron f danger. "Tis sweet to die for o country.” “You are a brave fellow!” “Thank you sir!"—Puck, 4 GUARANTEED CURE FOR Pi! reehing, Dot. Mieeding, rotradiog Pies Bit re auhrinea 15" refund money. INTMENT fall to care tn'6 to 14 ayer 5 If a married woman is fairly looking, loves ‘her husband, and sensible, that is about all ‘any could reasonably expect. Lewis’ Single Binder straight ‘e ay 10e for cigars not so good. Your or Lewis’ Factory, Peoria, Ill The man who is aiways going tf a lot of great things usually enti doing a few small ones. Robbed In Church. Just think what, an outrage it is robbed of all the benefits of tho sa by continuous coughing througout the sregation, when Anti-éripine fs guaras io quite, Bold everywhere ts evce, High finance is staying out of for doing what lands the low there every time. Stare ov Onto, Crry oF TouEDo, OP vent Coury, TM Boy Frank J. Cituwmr makes oath that he t pariuer'o? the Orin of Fea. Cunsny «0, sinees in the Clty of Toiedas Costs oa Sgro and tae ante rm wil poy ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS. for ecb sal fo of Catannm that cannot be cured by i Hat's Catanau Guns. FRANK J, cies Sworn to before me and aubscriied i) 9 tals oth day of December, kD. 1a. ad ‘i Wr cLEAsoM jamal ‘Noranr Pet Hails Catarsh Cure te taken tnterasy 1! ture op the hoa and mote stro ere Th Deseeka Gun & CO, Tl 0 rags, 730. ‘Take Hall'satlly Pile for constipation ‘What 4s criticism if you give somebody else is outrageous abust somebody gives it to you. r ‘The more we know of our {l's, th® easier and sooner relief will come Pains and aches of the flesh Joints and muscles are Rheumatic ty Va) | y i} we bs os | Drea. aN fer Gy, id Vn b> ZANG = + WN AS MARK ‘The mission of the Old-Monk> Cure St.Jacobs Oil is to cure, and the world knows it does it safely and surcly- Price, 250. and 50°. a